Not-fine

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I'm sorry for not being active but I just wrote this and I'm even confused by it a little but it felt good writing it

I'm fine
Just fine.
Nothing wrong nothing right
Just, fine.
I'm not ok with being fine
I've got it better then a lot of people but I don't like being just "fine"
Fine is average
I lied when I said nothings wrong
Because there's something just a little off
A little grain of salt in an ocean of problems
But the problem is I can't tell if my not-fine is normal
Because I don't know what's happening in their life and their head
My chest hurts because of all the not-fine fighting with all the "normal"
I don't really feel much of anything
I thought the warmth would bring constant happiness with the sunshine
But it's just like it was
Fine
A little wrong a little right
But mostly just fine
I'm (not)fine


Written-4/15/17

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