Shut Up and Kiss Me

Chapter 14: It's Complicated

  A hand muffled my scream before I could make any real noise. Glimmery golden eyes peered down at me. I knew it was Clayton instinctively. My heartbeat slowed and calmed. It had just been a nightmare. Disgruntled, I threw Clayton's hand off me and smacked his chest irritatedly as I sat up. I shot a glance over at Ben's bed. Either he was the best actor on the face of the Earth or he was still soundly sleeping and my dream hadn't disturbed him. I hoped it was the latter.

Clayton scrutinized me silently. Realizing that he was still here, I gestured animatedly towards the door and hissed, "Get out!"

I sensed his hesitation and annoyance with me, but he heeded my demand nonetheless.

As soon as he was gone, I approached Ben's bedside. "Ben? Are you awake?"

He stirred a little at my voice, but the crease between his eyebrows relaxed after a moment. He couldn't fake that. Thank God. Satisfied that he hadn't witnessed any of the previous events, I sidled out into the hallway and quietly pulled the door closed. Clayton waited there, just as I thought he would.

"What do you think you're doing?" I demanded.

"What am I doing? I'm sorry, did I or did I not just stop you from waking up the entire house?" He replied irritatedly.

I huffed. "You have to stop this."

"You were anxious and paralyzed with fear--I felt it. Strong emotions like that are hard to ignore... but, sure, next time I'll try harder to tune you out." Clayton made to leave.

Guilt swept through me like a broom to dust.

"Wait." I said and rubbed my face. "I'm sorry. I know you didn't ask for this." I paused. "Thank you.. for... what you did."

Clayton sighed. "You are complicated chaos."

I smirked. "Yeah, well, can't be helped."

We stood there in silence. I found myself comforted by it, like a warm blanket just out from the dryer wrapped around my shoulders.

"If I ask you something, will you answer me honestly?"

I peered at him in the darkness, considering what it would mean to tell him. I already knew what he wanted to ask. I don't know why I said what I did next, but I felt better for it.

"My brother, Ben, was attacked by some hunters a few years ago. He barely made it out alive. It turns out that one of them has moved into the area. It wasn't the best of reunions." I hesitated before revealing, "He killed me... in my dream."

"This guy hurt you."

Clayton wasn't referring to the dream. I rubbed my arm. I didn't want to revisit this now. Thanks to Brice I nearly lost everything I cared about. It still pained me to think about it.

"I should get back to bed."

Clayton nodded. I could feel his reluctance to end the conversation this way, but he didn't force it.

"Goodnight." He said.

"'Night."

I disappeared back into the bedroom. I didn't go back to sleep. Instead, I sat on my bed with my back to the wall and watched Ben's chest rise and fall rhythmically. I hugged my knees to my chest and rested my chin atop them. I sniffled and tears rippled in front of my eyes. I covered my mouth and nose to muffle my sobs. The conversation with Clayton hadn't been distraction enough from the events of my nightmare.

When the first signs of light filtered through the window, I stretched my legs out and stood. I didn't want Ben wondering why I hadn't slept. I rubbed my puffy eyes, collected some jeans and a t-shirt, and left for the bathroom. I needed to splash some water on my face. I could tell how physically exhausted I was from my reflection. This was not going to be easy to hide. Clayton probably already knew.