What's This?!

Welcome To: How To: Starring Silver!

Welcome to Episode 1 of How To.

Today, we learn: How To: Deal With Scammers.

I got a call on my phone from an unknown number, and I thought, let's mess with them a little.

I checked the number and she was with Telstra, which is why she was asking about phone lines. I bsed this, making it so I had no idea what I was talking about XD

I think I scared her a bit lol.

Was fun though. I'm gonna do this more often.

I also skipped parts of the conversation.
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Me: Hi, how are you? You've reached Jim's Morgue, you hurt 'em, we burn 'em, this is A-Jay speaking. How may I direct your call today?

Her: A Morgue?

Me: Yes, that's right. We also specialise with... *whispers* Arranged murders. Fun, right? I think it is.

Her: Oh... I've never done that.. Could I talk to the Manager of the business, please?

Me: Oh, your first murder to cover up? Good luck!

Her: What? No! No, you must be confused. I would like to talk with the Manager about the phone lines.

Me: Oh, shame. I've had no good calls today, aside from ordering pizza for breakfast.

Her: I'm sorry to hear that. Can I speak with the manager?

Me: He's busy at the moment.

Her: When is he free?

Me: I dunno. Whenever he finishes banging his intern.

Her: ...

Her: Oh.

Me: I can tell him it's urgent, if you like?

Her: Actually-

Me: *walks to bedroom door* *knocks* Uhm, sir?

Her: Really, you don't have to-

Me: Never mind! She's giving him a blow job now. Not a pretty sight. Speaking of blow jobs, my job blows. Always sitting on the phone. You know how boring that is, just sitting here managing calls and emails? I don't like it, but eh. There's this guy next to me, woah. He's pretty hot, so, bonus! And this chick beside me, I'm gonna strangle her one day. Pass it off as an accident. Good thing I work in a morgue, hey?

Her: Uh...

Me: I threw my stapler at her once.

Her: Oh. Um, I'm just-

Me: My back is killing me, ugh. We need need chairs that aren't lumps of plastic. Speaking of killing, you should hear some of the calls we get. One woman came in, her husband suffocated of her wedding ring. Do NOT want to know how, and she wouldn't tell us. Another person had tripped over their spinny chair during a fight and snapped his neck. Do you have spinny chairs where you work?

Her: Oh, yeah... Uhm... Why?

Me: You know how I said I hate my job?

Her: *just audible oh no*

Me: What say I get an office beside you? We could share stories, and strangle this bitch next to me and order pizza and hope we don't hear the manager with the intern any more and we could-

Her: *hangs up*