Start of Time | Stydia

-panic attack

spoilers for 3b - unedited

It's in class the feeling hits Lydia again.

She's been sat there thinking about what it was like only a few weeks ago, when Stiles was possessed by the Nogitsune. It still haunts her, how quickly he could switch. Seeing him go from goofy, sarcastic Stiles, to the cold, evil thing made goosebumps still run up and down her arms, make her heart pound quickly.

And that triggered the beginning of the panic attack.

When Lydia stood up, her head felt heavy, her vision went blurry. Then she couldn't breathe, her lungs were tightening, and she started hyperventilating. She couldn't even scream.

'Lydia, are you ok?'

It was Stiles, tapping her elbow. He was looking down at her, a worried expression on his face.

Her eyes flickered, watching his eyes, his mouth, how he spoke, how he pushed up the sleeves of his plaid shirt. She was checking he was still Stiles, even though there was no need anymore. The demon was gone, Stiles was fine, so why was she still panicking and still having nightmares?

'Lydia?'

Lydia shook her head, and she felt like someone was squeezing her lungs. And she was hot; too hot. There was beads of sweat appearing on her forehead, even though it wasn't exactly warm outside.

'I can't breathe, I can't- I...'

A look of realisation appeared on Stiles' face, and he stopped in the corridor, turning to face her. Students kept walking past, not noticing or not caring what was going on.

'Panic attack; try to focus on one thing, Lydia. Look, look right at me.' Stiles said hurriedly.

Lydia closed her eyes tightly, shaking her head quickly, strawberry blonde hair whipping side to side. Her breathing was rapid, and Stiles was starting to panic a little too, but only because he was worried for Lydia.

He took her hand, pulling her into the empty locker rooms and sat her down on the bench.

She looked like a little girl: her hair was twisted at the sides and falling in auburn waves, and she was wearing a white polo shirt tucked into a little navy skirt patterned with lighter flowers. Her pale hands were twisting the hem of her skirt as she sat down, bottom lip shaking.

'I still- I still can't breathe- I-'

'Lydia, focus, look at me, Lydia. Look at me.' Stiles said, kneeling so he was in front of where Lydia was sat; he was still the same height as her there.

He put his hand on her shoulder, the other tilting her chin up to look at him. Stiles had been told from Allison that Lydia had been suffering, but he didn't realise how bad. Ever since the Nogitsune possessing him had been killed, everyone around him seemed like they were still treading on glass. Of course they were all glad he was fine, but he could still see the panic in their eyes. He still felt it himself, it was the reason he barely slept and when he did, woke up screaming and shaking.

'Lydia, look at me!'

The strawberry blonde blinked, her eyes locking on his own dark ones, and Stiles saw the same panic he felt reflected there.

He leant forwards; maybe it was because he wanted to, or maybe because he was remembering what happened when he was the one having the panic attack.

Stiles pressed his lips against hers; this was the first time he had been the one to initiate a kiss, and the second time he'd kissed the girl he'd been in love with since the third grade.

Lydia froze for a second, then her fingers loosened their grip on the material of her skirt as she relaxed into Stiles. Her eyelashes fluttered and she closed her eyes, leaning instinctively towards him, like a magnet gravitating towards another.

They stayed together for a few seconds, and Stiles was wishing those seconds could be a minute, an hour, eternity, because it was Lydia. But it wasn't an eternity, or even a minute, and they both pulled back slowly. Stiles looked at her, her eyes still closed and an unreadable expression on her face, eyebrows knotted together in thought.

Then she opened her eyes, green orbs pale and seemingly glassy. Lydia swallowed, and smoothed down her skirt, more of a habit than just an action.

'You remembered.' Lydia said quietly, voice barely above a whisper. Her eyes were cast downwards, eyelashes shadows on her cheeks. 'Thank you.' Her gaze flickered up, and there were so many emotions in her eyes Stiles found it hard to concentrate on just one.

'It's ok. You, uh, held your breath.' He breathed, watching her as she bit her lip, nodding slowly.

'Yeah, I did.' Lydia murmured, tucking a stray curl behind her ear.

The moment ended then, as they always do, when Lydia stretched her arms out in front of her, and smiled.

'Well, we always get caught up in this situation, don't we?' Lydia said, corner of her mouth turning up.

'Yeah, we do.' Stiles replied, nodding. 'We really do.'

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hope you liked this: i just have way too many stydia feels and i wanted to try and write them :)