The Lost Souls (Emo/Punk Niall Horan Fanfic)

Chapter 11 - Parasites

*Nikita's P.O.V.*

"What do you mean?" I asked Niall.

"When someone you're really close to wrongs you like that, you always feel like everyone is out to get you. You can't trust anyone because you feel like if you do someone else will fuck you over. You always feel like you should keep your distance from everyone, which gets kinda lonely sometimes. You know what I mean?"

"I can't say I do"

"You're lucky" he told me.

"Yeah, maybe I am"

"The worst thing is, you can never get over something like that. It just kind of eats you up, like a..." He trailed off, trying to think of the word.

"Parasite"

"Exactly!"

"I know what you mean"

"What's eating you up?" He asked me.

"I don't really wanna talk about it"

We sat in silence for a little while longer until it was broken by Niall.

"Looks like the party's starting to clear out a little, which is pretty good 'cause I'm out of beer" he said, making us both chuckle a little.

"Guess we were out here longer than I thought"

"I guess so"

Niall stood up and held his hand out to help me up.

"Niall, I'm not drunk, I can stand up" I laughed.

"Just being a gentleman"

"Well, thank you" I said, taking his hand and getting up.

We walked inside and Niall placed his hand on my back so he wouldn't loose me in the crowd. By now most of the partygoers were passed out or had left, but there were still plenty of people.

"Someone broke the TV, I'm in so much trouble" Louis said, acting oddly.

"Someone's blazing" Niall said to me in a sing-song voice. We both laughed in response before approaching Louis and Eleanor. "Where are Melanie and Cher?"

"They passed out so I brought 'em upstairs, so no one would try anything"

"You should have told me, I would've helped you"

"I didn't need help, Melanie passed out way before Cher" Louis told him.

"I'm not surprised. Melanie's a total lightweight"

"Are you two gonna stay here tonight?"

"I can't drive, I've been drinking" Niall told him.

"Well, you two can crash in a guest room if you want. You may have to share though. I think almost all of the rooms are occupied" he replied, walking upstairs with Eleanor.

"What?" Niall called after him.

Louis continued up the stairs as if he hadn't heard Niall.

"Wanna get a drink before we head upstairs?" Niall asked awkwardly.

"Sure" I replied.

We went into the kitchen and Niall grabbed a beer and I grabbed a strawberry wine cooler.

"You alright?" I asked him.

"What do you mean?"

"You look uncomfortable"

"You know how earlier I said things had gotten worse as far as how I've responded to everything?" He started.

"Yeah"

"It has to do with that"

"I don't understand. How have things gotten worse for you and how does that have anything to do with why you're uncomfortable?"

"You ask a lot of questions" he told me, drinking his beer.

"You don't give a lot of answers" I retorted.

"I told you I have trust issues"

"Yeah, but I don't see how that has anything to do with you being uncomfortable or how things have gotten worse"

"I don't feel comfortable sharing things about myself because I don't trust anyone" he answered. "What's your excuse?"

"What do you mean?"

"What's your excuse for not telling me about your demons?"

"I guess I don't tell people about my problems because I'm so used to having to put on a perfect person façade from when I lived with my mum" I told him.

"But your mum's not around"

"So? The years of dealing with everything she put me through fucked me up. If anyone should understand that, it should be you"

"I understand where you're coming from. What I don't understand is why you won't tell me about your demons, but you expect me to tell you about mine" he explained.

"I wasn't really looking at it that way. I'm just a curious person"

"I'm not a very trusting person. I'm not going to open up to you, I've never opened up to anyone. What makes you think I'll open up to you if you're withholding information from me?" He pointed out.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have tried to push you into opening up to me"

"It's fine. C'mon, let's go to bed, I'm tired" he said.

We threw away our empty bottles and went upstairs. We entered the only guest bedroom we could find that wasn't occupied.

I sent a text to Harry saying that I was going to be spending the night.

"So... How do you want to do this?"

"Do what?" Niall asked, looking kind of nervous.

"What side of the bed do you sleep on? Do you like cuddling?"

"I don't know if I like cuddling. I haven't cuddled with anyone since I was 8" he told me.

"Is that when you were kidnapped?"

"Yeah, that's when I distanced myself from everyone"

"Is that why you're uncomfortable? Because you like to be distanced from everyone?" I asked, he nodded in response. "If you want, I can text Harry and have him pick me up"

"You don't have to do that" he replied.

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable"

"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine" he said. He removed his shirt, revealing the tattoos that covered his torso. "I'm not sleeping in jeans. I'm gonna go see if Louis has any joggers I can borrow" he said, leaving the room.

When he came back he was holding his jeans and wearing a pair of Louis' joggers. He tossed his jeans on the floor by his shirt and crawled in bed.

"What am I going to sleep in?" I wondered. Niall tossed me his shirt. "Thanks, where am I going to change?"

"Nothing I haven't seen before"

"I'm not changing in front of you"

"Why not? It's not like it's any different than seeing you in a bikini" he pointed out.

"True" I said, turning my back to him, starting to change.

"You're no fun!" He whined, making me laugh. "Jesus! I can see your ribs, I thought you were trying to put on weight"

"I am" I lied.

Now changed, I crawled into bed beside him.

"Do you want to cuddle or not?" I asked him, changing the subject.

"Sure, why not?"

"Yay! I love cuddling!" I said, cuddling with him. He chuckled at my reaction. "Goodnight, Niall"

"Goodnight, Nikita"
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(A/N)

Kind of a long chapter....

💋 -TVo