Cover It With A Smile | A Skymau FF

#NoMoreBullying

I know two of us had done this a while ago...but I still felt like I should do this.

I was born in Pennsylvania. For starters, my name is Rory, a name originally used for boys. And I'm a GIRL. So from the start I started getting bullied about it. My first bully was one grade above me, until I skipped a grade. He would always tease me about my name, and just annoy me 24/7, and sometimes push/shove me around. I kicked him in the balls.....only to lose a few of my friends, and to be named "The Bully". I was the one bullied in the first place though! At that time though, I had a lot more friends, so the loss of a few wasn't that big to me. Many people accepted me for my name and personality, and so I had a LOT of friends! And everyone accepted my sister, who had/has a serious case of autism. I wasn't bullied very much anymore, because I had a lot of friends, and I got good grades. The only thing people would tease me about was my name, and I didn't mind that nearly as much. So my life was pretty much bully-less!

Then that all changed at the end of my third grade year.

I moved to Massachusetts. My grades started drooping, because in MA, they moved at a much faster pace, and was a harder community academically. And, people weren't so accepting of my sister. And I got bullied for that. But, I had a lot of friends. They were the type of friend that laughed at each other, and with each other, but scorned others, even though we weren't popular or anything. As my friends and I moved further up the grades, they turned mean. To everyone. An me, being the oddball of the group, who wasn't nearly as popular, pretty, and mean as the others......was bullied the most by them. They say it as if they don't mean it. I'll have made a mistake while doing something, and they would laugh at me. And my best friend.....she is the worst of them all. The irony, right? She would bully me about any mistakes, even small ones, for the next few months, using words like "failure", "dummy", "duma$$", "stupid", "fatty", and "bish". This kept going, and as it continued I would just fake smile and fake laugh with them. Pretending to be happy, and cheerful, like I was when I first met them. Because if I tried to stand up for myself, they would be like, "You know we're only joking, right? You're so STUPID!" And then they would get mad at me for weeks. After that period of time, they would act like nothing happened. But it hurt. It really did. And the fact none of them ever noticed, or ever cared, hurt even more.

Sometimes, they would bully me for the pettiest things. I would have been excited about something, and they'd use that against me as if I was bragging. For example:

Me: Hey guys, guess what!

Friends: What? *annoyed*

Me: I got a new silver flute! I'm so excited to use it! It's an open-hole too! Isn't that cool? *really excited*

BFF: Oh no need to brag about it, little miss I have rich parents so I can get whatever I want! *mocking and mean tone*

Me: I'm not rich! It's just-

BFF: I don't fricking care.

Friends: *nods*

And then when I get good grades:

BFF: What'd you guys get on that test? I got a 84.

Friend1: I got a 100!

Friend2: I got an 79...

Me: I got an 97!

BFF: Wooow, see she *points at me* is SUPER SMART! She always gets good grades! *mockingly and meanly*

Me: I'm really not!

Friends: *rolls eyes*

And those moments happen almost every day! Because of that I feel like crying every day! I also get worried of being judged by them. At that point I had lost myself. I was almost emotionless, not that anyone noticed. Until I met a group of amazing, beautiful girls, and we started a collab account! The account is this one! Then I made another collab account with some other amazing girls. Because of that, I have a reason to smiel again. I even do fake cheeriness, especially when we text. But not nearly as much as before, because they ACTYALLY make me happy. They have helped me figure out who I am, and have brought me back to myself. So thanks a million girls. Along with the couple of people who I'd contacted to help with depression. When helping them, I realized how sad this world is. And we can change it!

I, my_ships_, a girl with minor depression, who tries to help others and stay cheerful, know that bullying is NOT okay. Now we can change that! #NoMoreBullying! Thank you so much for reading this all the way through if you did...I nearly cried pouring my heart out to you guys.

Have a great day readers!

Baii!

P.S. If you ever need to talk to someone about your problems, depression, or anything else like friendship problems, ANYTHING, feel free to contact me through my_ships_ and I'll help you out! Don't be afraid, and no need to ask! Just start ranting, and I promise I'll respond ASAP!