Begin Again - A KaRa (Mika Reyes & Ara Galang) Fanfiction

Seventeen

I couldn't sleep that night. I couldn't bring myself to process what had happened. Affected pa rin ako sa nangyari dati... but, more than that, affected pa rin si Ara sa nangyari dati... and I hate myself for it. Bakit ko ba pinabayaang wala na kaming any form of communication this past three years? She was my best friend! She needed me when all those people were coming up with rumors... and I left her alone! I became distant with her! She liked me... and I ignored her! Ang tanga mo Mika Aereen!

I guess maybe it's because I wasn't ready for something like that. For the longest time, Ara was my best friend, at nasanay na 'kong ganun 'yung pagtingin ko sa kanya. Looking back at it now, I admired Ara, I really did, and... I think it could've been something more if I just gave her a chance. Kaso hindi. Naging duwag ako, 'cause I've always been afraid of trying something new. And now... it might just be the biggest regret of my life.

I sat up, grabbed a pillow and used it to cover my lap. I looked down on the pillow for a while, then I've thought of something to do with it.

I lifted it, shoved it on my face, and screamed. I just screamed, and screamed, and screamed. I remember Cienne doing this to release the anger that she had, hopefully through this, I'd be able to release everything that I've been feeling lately, too.

Wala akong sinigaw sa words, naramdaman ko lang 'yung mga sigaw kong galing pa sa tyan ko at hindi tumigil hangga't napagod ako. Somehow, it helped, but it seemed like I was feeling too much at the moment that it wasn't as effective as it was to Cienne.

Nakatitig lang ako sa ceiling ko ngayon. I checked the clock and it was already 4:07 in the morning, yet, I was nowhere near sleepy. My eyes shifted from my ceiling to my phone on the desk. I stared at my phone for a while, then, I remembered: I had Ara's number.

I stood up and grabbed my phone. I held it between my hands, staring at Ara's number as I'd realized-- imposibleng gising si Ara nang gantong oras. But I knew I had to say something. Something I couldn't say to her in person.

I can't call her, I can't possibly see, or, even hear, her reaction. And so, I decided to text her.

Inisip ko nang mabuti kung anong sasabihin ko. Gusto ko, 'yung sasabihin ko, 'yung hindi kailangan ng reply. 'Yung pwede niya lang titigan, then, 'yun na. I wanted us to be okay. Sa Monday, makikita ko ulit siya... and, kailangan maayos na kami. And so, I'd decided to text her this...

To: Ara

I'm sorry. I really am.

The text was short, but, it was all I needed to say. She deserved that apology. It took me three years, but, I hope she'll still consider it.

Finally, it felt like the day was ended with that text. My thoughts were finally silenced. I hopped on to my bed, closed my eyes, and drifted off to sleep.

---

"Mikang! Uy! Pssttt!"

I slowly opened my eyes. Una kong nakita ko 'yung mukha ni Cienne na sobrang excited.

"Gising na! I have great news!"

I checked the clock, and it was seven o'clock. Ugh.

I grabbed the nearest pillow and shoved it on my face. "Pagod ako, Ciennang. Mamaya na lang 'yung... 'yung news mo..." Humihikab-hikab kong sabi.

"Hay nako! Kagabi ka pa pagod, hindi mo na nga ako inuwian ng pagkain, hindi mo pa kinwento 'yung nangyari kagabi!" Cienne paused and I heard my phone ring. I didn't mind it, probably another social media notification. I heard Cienne's footsteps. "Uy! Speaking of, tinext ka ni Ara oh!"

"TALAGA?!"

I didn't waste a second. Tumayo na ako at kinuha 'yung phone na hawak ni Cienne. It was true, Ara had texted me back.