hurricane | calum hood

clouds

I'm not usually one to linger on words or hang on to phrases but when it comes to people I actually care about; I don't just linger. The words attach to me like my brain is a planet with an obvious magnetic field and the words my moons. Bright, orbiting and most of all attracted to the planet also known as my brain. Stupid analogies for a stupid girl. Hence why waking up in a room which isn't mine was a normal activity for me. I needed to escape those words.

I slowly sat up in the mess of a bed that I had made on the floor. I squinted my eyes as I looked at the clock on the wall in front of me. It was almost ten to seven. I realised I was in Belle's room straight away. The tacky band pictures with the magical fairy lights wrapped around them. Belle, my best friend. Belle means beautiful and oh lord, she was.

"Best Friend"

What did it mean? It's not as if I rank my friends from best to worst. It's like uttering the word love. The word doesn't even show up in my vocabulary because I have no reason to say it. I didn't really love anyone. The way people threw around words such as love and best friend made them seem almost meaningless. I had no idea who my supposed best friend was but Belle was the closest person I had. As for loving people, of course I loved my family but that was different. I couldn't love anyone romantically. I was only seventeen and had a whole life ahead of me. I loved my parents but half the time that love was unrequited. Either from my side or my parents. Being an only child meant they had to love me, I guess. But they we're arrogant and argumentative and half the time Id find myself swimming in their criticism.

I'm not your typical teenager. Or society's view of your 'typical teenager'. No I didn't have supernatural powers and no I was not a supermodel. I had eating disorders and depression for 2 years. You wouldn't see it for my 'award winning' smile if you didn't know me well. I guess it was getting better but it was still there. It wasn't noticeable but that's only because I tried very hard to hide it. Sometimes a little too hard. I acted confident in the hope that people wouldn't see right through me. I didn't want to be a see through pane of glass. Rather I was a brick wall. No one knew about it except Belle. Not even my other two close friends, Luke and Michael.

I was slowly creeping out of Belle's window to go home, when I heard a noise.

"You left your jumper S." I heard a sleepy Belle say while pointing at my creased grey jumper lying on the floor.

"Thanks Belle. Now, get back to sleep you muppet." I said chuckling.

"I am, I'll call you later. If I can be bothered getting up." she said, half asleep.

"Okay, you idiot. See you later." I said while climbing out the window.

Belle lived only a few streets away, considering this was a very small town. I walked back home at seven in the morning in just my t-shirt and my pyjamas, but considering it was winter, I was pretty cold. As I breathed in the chilly air, I smiled. This was the serenity I had always liked. For that moment, not even the freezing breeze could shake me from my thoughts. I was happy with my lonesome walk home through the deserted morning streets.

Once I got to my house, I sneaked through the back door to my house and I climbed up the ledge on top of my conservatory and on to the ledge of my open bedroom window and slipped inside.

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I woke up to my dumb so called "vintage telephone" ringtone playing loudly right next to my ear. I picked up the phone lazily.

"What?!" I said, slightly annoyed that someone called me at.... oh, half past twelve.

"Woah, calm down S! It's just me, Luke!" Luke laughed into the phone.