Honey Gold

11.

/HONEY'S POV 🍯/

"You know you really make me feel some type of way about you." Jamar rub his fingers through my hair while I laid on his chest.

"I do?" I looked up at him. I was at Jamar's house and we've been laying up in his bed watching TV. He asked me to come to his house today and trust me it took him a lot of bribing to get me to skip school and come to his house. Well not that much cause all he had to do was say something about food.

"Yeah, you special." he lifted my chin and kissed me. All I could do was smile at him. Jamar did mean something to me but something never seemed right unless I was with him...with Khalil.

Girls like me don't fall in love.

Girls like me could never be happy.

I'm nothing like a girlfriend is suppose to be. I'm Honey. I'm damaged and I don't think I can ever be fixed.

I sighed. " I think its time for me to go home." I sat up to put back on my shoes.

"Ight let me get a shirt." He stood walking over to his closet to grab a shirt. After he put his shirt on we was ready to go.

××××

"Why won't you let me just drive you all the way back to your house? Jamar sighed pulling up to a curb at the park. "I don't feel right just dropping you off and letting you walk back home in the dark." He shut the engine off and looked over at at me.

"Jamar I will be fine, I walk home from school most of the time." I told him.

"Not in the fucking dark." He got out the car walking around to open my door. I grabbed his hand and stepped out the car. He shut the door behind me and leaned my body back against the door. "Leme walk you then." He grabbed my waist pulling me closer to him. I shook my head.

"Jamar there are street light I can see perfectly fine." He sighed once again looking me in the eyes. It wasn't long before he starting smirking.

"What?" I began to blush.

"Nuthin Mann." He leaned down to kiss me on the lips. My arms automatically flew around his neck. We made out for what was probably two minutes but seemed like forever. I was the first to pull away.

"I gotta go." I said breathlessly.

He kissed me one last time before biting his lip and nodding his head. "You better text me when you make it home." I blushed. "I will." I told him.

"Ight, Ima letchu go." he walked around to his side of the car and got in rolling the passenger window down. " baby im not playing bout that text." I rolled my eyes playfully.

"I know Jamar I will text you right when I get home." I laughed. He chuckled and waited. Knowing what he wanted I began walking to my house. He waited until I was at the end of the street where he knew my house was right around the corner before he drove off. Im not in love with Jamar but that's partially because I don't love myself. In the end I will only push him away.

When I walked In my yard I waited until I got to the door before I sent Jamar a text telling him that I made it and goodnight. He text back within seconds sending me kissing heart emojis and telling me goodnight also. I didn't bother to respond back. I stuck my phone in my back pocket and unlocked the front door with my key.

I made sure to lock the door behind me when I got inside. I quietly made my way up the stairs to my room. It was dark and all I wanted to do was take a shower and go to sleep. I grabbed a shirt and shorts from my dresser and went to the bathroom to take a shower. I was in their for a bit lost in my thoughts. I didn't get out the shower until I felt the water getting cold. I stepped out the shower drying myself off and slipping my sleeping clothes on. I turned my phone all the way off before sticking it under the bathroom sink in my little pink box. I walked out into my room placing my clothes in the dirty clothes basket. I looked over at my clock beside my bed which read 11:55pm. I sighed why couldn't school start at like twelve in the afternoon that way everyone would be woke and not still tired at six in the morning?

I pulled my covers back and laid down. I turned to to my side to go to sleep but my door was cracked. I tried to go to sleep but the longer I stared at the crack the more it looked like someone was standing there. I looked away closing my eyes trying to not think about it. Deciding to suck it up and not be scared I got up to close the door. Before I made it half way across the room the door opened and Dan propped himself against the wall blowing out smoke from his nose and mouth. I breathed out afraid to move. He took the cigarette and placed it against the wall putting it out.

"Did you go to school today?" He asked straightening himself. His voice was calm but still intimidating.

"Yes." I answered a little to quickly. He began walking over to me. "Don't lie to me Honey." He said his voice a little deeper than before.

"I..I did." I looked up at him. He leaned down to kiss me but I quickly turned my head so his lips would meet with the side of my cheek. He sighed heavily.

He walked over to my bed and sat down patting the spot next to him."Have a Seat." I was hesitate but listened. I sat down next to him leaving a little space between me and him but he quickly filled it by moving me closer to him. " Answer this Honey. Why in the fuck are we getting calls from the clinic?" even though I could barely see him I knew he was staring at me. I looked away. "I don't know." my voice began to shake.

He chuckled deeply. "You don't know?" he stood up and towered over me. " Then why are they calling stating your name and asking us if you been alright since loosing a baby?"

With every word he said a tear dropped. I bit my lip to stop them from quivering. " I...I ..I don't know, they must have confused me with someone else." I said trying control the sob that wanted to escape my mouth.

His hands found there way around my neck "Honey don't fuck with me!" He spat. I placed my hands over his to pull them away from me. "Why did you do it?" Why did you go an kill my baby?" He broke down and dropped to his knees in front of me. His hands loosened a little around my neck. I couldn't stop the tears from falling. "Im sorry." I never seen him like this. Him crying. He took his hands from my throat and wrapped them around my waist picking me up and laying me back on the bed. Instead of him climbing on top of me like he normally does he laid beside me and rubbed his hands up and down my stomach.

Did he think I was honestly going to keep a baby that belonged to him?

I laid there an let him continue to rub my stomach afraid if I tried to stop him he would get angry. After a while of just laying there. He finally stopped and stood up.

"Its okay Honey." He placed his hands on my cheeks rubbing them."We can try Again." with that he walked out slamming my room door.

FML

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Honey in MM

Have a Wonderful Awesome Day!😘