Tiffany's POV
It's been 4 days since Erika disappeared, I tried to find her with all I can. She has no place to go. I didn't go to my work too, I took sick leave. I asked Siwon and Baekhyun to help me find her but until now, she's missing.
Siwon and I were in his car, it was raining outside. I wonder if Erika has shelter in this pouring rain.
But what if she doesn't have? She'll be sick. I'm so worried about her, I regret that I pushed her away.
Now I realized that I want her to just be with me, live with me and I want to take care of her. My heart was longing for her. I'm uncomfortable without her and just thinking that she's suffering somewhere makes me insane, weak and dreadful.
"Tiffany, I think you should rest now. We can do this again tomorrow," Siwon said.
I was crying and I couldn't stop myself "No, it's raining. What if she has no shelter? She will be sick. She has no place to go and this is my fault!"
"Have you contacted your relatives? Maybe she'd go there?" Siwon trying to figure it out. But no, she's not my cousin and I don't have relatives.
I sighed.
He doesn't know the truth that Erika has amnesia. I was very scared of the thought that Erika remembered everything then she just went home to her family without saying good bye to me. She left me? I shuddered with that thought and it made me out of my mind.
I cried and sniffled very hard, I could see sympathy through Siwon's eyes as he rubbed my back to comfort me.
Siwon took a deep breath "I will drop you off at your apartment, you need a rest," then he drove off.
-
In my apartment, it's quiet and I'm not used to it. Erika was childish who always do dork things to get my attention or even not.
I like her presence near me, it soothes me. And now that she's gone, I'm like a lost puppy here.
I have my place but I feel that I don't belong here because I only belong where Erika is.
What's happening to me? I just met her few weeks ago but I feel like I've known her for a long time.
Erika just reminds me of my best friend, Taeyeon. They're look alike, they're both dorks and childish. I know it's wrong to compare them, Taeyeon is dead and I feel like she came back for me as Erika. I'm really crazy to think that.
I miss Taeyeon so much, she's my best friend. I always remember the day she confessed to me but I rejected her, it's the same day that she got her accident and died.
I wish I didn't reject her or what if I went out with her that day, and not with Siwon, maybe she's still alive. It's my fault, I hate myself for hurting her. She don't deserve to die and I don't deserve her love for me.
I took can beers from the refrigerator, I'm glad, I bought some when I went to the grocery store. I hope it could help me to forget Erika for awhile.
After I drank 5 can beers, I feel tipsy already. I don't have high tolerance when it comes to alcohol drinks. I get drunk easily.
I found myself crying again, I miss Erika so much.
All I want is to see her again, to be with me. I will treat her better when she get back here. I want her touch, I want her kiss, I want everything about her.
I feel like she's Taeyeon and I will admit it now or never. I really don't love Siwon but Taeyeon. I love her, I'm just coward to accept the fact that I love her more than a best friend. I'm afraid what people will think about us. I'm so stupid that time!
