Gold Skies & Blue Waves (Martin Garrix fanfiction)

Chapter 14

Once I'm outside I take in a deep breath, although it feels like I can't breathe. I have such a heavy feeling on my chest. It literally feels like my heart is breaking in thousand little pieces. Tears are streaming down my face. I breathe heavily while running away. I have no idea where I'm heading to, but I feel like I need to escape. I want to escape reality. I end up at a bench near a canal. I feel everything at once, and I feel nothing in the same time. I feel empty and full of emotions. I feel used. I was just his temporary thing. I'm pathetic.

I feel so cold, it's freezing outside and I'm only wearing a dress. I can only come up with Dean. I text him and ask him to pick me up. He answers me and tells me he's on his way. I think about what I just saw. Martijn looked like he was heaving such a good time with that girl. He probably missed that. I'm not good in being loving. Deans car pulls up and I get in. We hug for awhile and he looks at me. "Oh dear Sooph, you look terrible" he hugs me again. "Can we please go home, I'm exhausted" I ask.
We drive silently, 'someone like you' by Adele comes up the radio. This couldn't get any worse.

Nevermind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too, don't forget me I beg
I'll remember you said, sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead, sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead..

The lyrics hit me. I used to listen to Adele when I felt lonely. Her voice and lyrics comfort my sadness. But it also makes it worse. We arrive at Deans house and go inside. "You can sleep in my bed, I'll sleep on the mattress on the ground" he says. "No it's okay just sleep in your own bed, I'll sleep on the mattress" I say. He hands me a big comfy shirt and some sweatpants. We brush our teeth and go to bed. "We'll talk tomorrow, you need rest. It's all going to be alright Sooph. Try not to worry too much" Deans says. "I will, thank you. Goodnight" I say.

Dean falls asleep soon, but I can't sleep. Too much thoughts are spinning around. I think about Martijn. Why would he told the paparazzi that we were dating if he still liked her? I don't even know her name. I feel tears again. I'm not ready to go through this. I put on some music. I need distraction. I'm falling asleep, finally..

I wake up from the sound of a shower. I look for Dean but can't find him. He's probably showering. I grab my phone and unlock it. 15 missed phone calls from Martijn. And 20 messages. I'm not in the mood so I put my phone away. It's 10:30 AM. I just wanna have fun with Dean today and not think about Martijn. He's not gonna break me, although I think he already did that. Dean comes out of the bathroom and greets me. I take a shower now. The hot water feels good on my skin. It brushes away the stained tears. When I'm done I walk out of the bathroom to meet Dean. We eat breakfast and go out to do the things we used to do back in the days. Go to our favorite cafe to drink some good cappuccino, then walk through the park and visiting big bookstores to get lost in all the story's. I love hanging out with Dean and it really made me forget about Martijn for awhile.

We're back at Deans house now and I grab my phone out of my bag. Another 10 missed phone calls and messages. I decide to open the messages.

Where are you?

Sooph? Where are you?

I'm fucking worried about you

Please answer my calls or at least text me

I'm sorry

Let me explain

I'm so worried, please tell me if you're safe

Our plane leaves at 9PM, text me

I decide to text him about the plane part. I need to get home though.

I'll be at Schiphol at 7:30 PM

It's 6 PM now and I say goodbye to Dean. I had an awesome day today and I'm so glad he's my best friend. We hug for ages and we promise each other to stay best friends forever. I really love him. I go in my uber and put on my Adele playlist.

I feel tears coming up again. Reality really hits me. I start thinking about my past and about everything that happened.

I'm the reason everyone leaves me. Everyone leaves me because I'm not caring enough. I never show someone I love them. I'm not even a good friend. It's logical that people are done with me. It's logical that they'll find other, better, people. I can't blame them. It's not weird that they leave you Sooph. Honestly, if I were them, I would do the same fucking thing..