I Will Fix You (Ziall)

Chapter 22

Niall sneaked inside the house in the middle of the night. It's been three days since he gone out, he knows the boys are now searching for him.

Sneaking out is more easy than sneaking in, eh? He thought.

He opened the door carefully and stepped inside. The room is dark and is only being lit up by the streetlights outside. He closed the door silently and began to head for the stairs when he heared a moan coming from the living room. He shrugged, thinking maybe one of the boys brought a girl and they're already doing 'it' so no chance for him to stop them. He was about to head for the stairs again when he heared the girl moaning a name.

"Ahh, Zayn.."

He stopped dead in his track. He started to sweat and he can't move. He tried to reach for the railings but even his hands he can't move. He inhaled deeply and turned toward the direction of the living room and saw shadows approaching. He eventually came into his senses and qiuckly walked behind a medium sized cabinet to hide himself. He squatted so the cabinet will cover his whole body while trying to stop himself from peeking.

He kept on sweating cold sweats and he started to breath heavily. He tried to stay still until he heard another moan and that's when curiousity got him. He truned around a little and peek towards the direction of the stairs and there he saw Zayn and a blonde girl kissing each other hard. 

Zayn's right hand is travelling up and down the girl's legs until it stopped right under the girl's short dress while his left hand is caressing the girl's shoulders. The blonde's hand is travelling around Zayn's body. 

Niall wished he didn't peeked at them. But he did.

Zayn turned the girl so Niall can only see the girl's back. They continue kissing and Niall continued staring when suddenly Zayn tilted his head with his eyes open and Niall swear Zayn saw him peeking. They just stared at each other's eyes before Zayn stopped kissing the girl and whispered something in right ear. The girl giggled and Zayn looked at Niall once more and he smirked at the blonde lad. Then he carried the girl princess-like and ascended the stairs. Niall was left dumbstruck, looking at the two figures.

He sniffed. And that's the only time he realized he'd been crying. He was suddenly drained out and he slipped slowly until he's finally sitting down on the floor. He kept on crying silently. His hands on top of his chest clutchingtightly like his life depended on it. He can feel the excruciating pain travelling all over his body.

Why is he doing this? Why is he so angry at me? 

Niall doesn't know why. He doesn't know if Zayn's really angry at him. Or if Zayn just wanted to play a game. Or if this is all just a joke. He's not sure if all of these is really happening but he's sure as hell he wish he's not feeling this deadly pain right now.

~**~

Niall woke with a start, he's head pounding. He realized that he's still behind the cabinet near the doorstep. He fell asleep crying. Because of Zayn. He tied to sit up but his body is all sore and aching. He stood up slowly and stretched, hoping it'll make the aching go away, but for the thousandth time, he's wrong.

He carefully took a step and started to climb the stairs when he heard footsteps from above and when he looked up he saw Zayn laughing with the blonde girl who's giggling. They stopped in their tracks when they noticed Niall. Zayn's face automatically darkened, his smile turning nto a scowl while the girl smiled widely at Niall.

"Hey there Snowflake!" Said the girl and she winked at him. 

Zayn rolled his eyes and put his arms around the girl's waist.

"C'mon, he don't sway that way." 

"What do you mean?" Asked the girl full of confusion while Niall's face is pure horror. Zayn chuckled and kissed the girl's neck.

"Nah. Let's just go away from here. It's not healthy to be here, I might get a deadly disease." Then Zayn pulled the girl and when the brushed past Niall, Zayn looked at him emotionless. 

As the door closed, Niall's tears started to pour down again. He breathed heavily and turned around to continue climbing up the stairs when he saw Louis at the top, looking at him sympathetically. Niall looked down and brushed away the tears on his face and finally continued to climb up. He just walked past Louis, ignoring the blue-eyed boy completely. 

Louis opened his mouth to say something but he chose to close it again knowing no words can comfort Niall right know. He then tried to grab Niall's arm but stopped mid-air thinking that maybe, what Niall needs most right now is sometime for himself. A little time to think things over. A small space to breath.

Niall opened the door of his room and closed it, mentally thanking Louis for not talking to him or he might just have to break down. And he doesn't want to break down again in front of anyone, ever. It makes him feel like he's so weak. 

In those three days that he's gone from home, he think things over. What Agent K told him. How he needs to fix himself up before he can fix other people around him. He doesn't really know where to start but it seems like he can't do it. Just thinking about what happened last night made it impossible for Niall to 'fix' himself.  He's so weak, so fragile. Like with just a snap, he'll be torn into pieces.

For the second time that day, he breathed deeply. He's so hopeless. He doesn't know what to do next, he doesn't know what to think anymore. His mind is all blank. Too many problems can really fuck the hell out of you. He  wish he could just be dumb, emotionless, numb, a robot. Nothing to feel, nothing to think. Just doing what he's supposed to be 'doing'.

Fuck my life. 

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Sorry for the typos and grammatical errors.