too cliché - jonathan brandis

chapter 7 - woah, hold up

I stood there for a few seconds, wondering whether to pull away or kiss back. I thought about what I said earlier "I'm literally a fetus..."

I slowly pulled away and looked down. I could tell that Jonathan felt uncomfortable, since I had just obviously rejected him. I didn't want to, but I had to.

"I'm sorry." I whispered and looked up at Jonathan. We made eye contact, but he looked away quickly. He sighed uncomfortably, yet sadly.

"Jon, I swear I would've kissed you back, but we're just so youn-" I mumbled. Jonathan cut me off, "I get it. You probably only think of me as a friend."

"No, Jonathan. I really like y-" I stopped mid-sentence because Jon started to walk away. I stood still, listing to his quiet sniffles in the distance. I didn't know whether to follow him or go back to Charlise's house.

I decided to run after him. As I eventually caught up to him, I heard him sigh again.

I looked into his deep, blue eyes. They were glossed over with tears and had a sad vibe radiating off them. I felt so bad and guilty, but I should not be expected to kiss him back. It's my choice.

"Xanthe?" I heard Jon manage to say.

"Yeah?" I asked quietly. I felt him grab my hand and pull it onto his lap.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." He whispered. I pulled tighter on his hand.

"No, it's okay. I'm just so confused right now." I whispered back.

"What do you mean?" He asked as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Well, I don't know. I really like you, Jon. But, I'm so young. And I don't know what I want out of us." I confessed.

"I like you too, Xanthe. And who cares if we're too young? I like you, and I can't control my feelings."

"Jonathan, you're making this so cringey." I laughed, "But, honestly, what do you even want from this?" I motioned, pointing to both of us.

"I want you, well us... together." He smiled, looking directly at me. I was overwhelmed. I hadn't really thought about Jon liking me. I mean, I thought we might of had something, but I never thought of this seriously.

Before I could respond, Jonathan lips were back on mine. He grabbed me this time. I grabbed him back, but broke the kiss.

"I'm sorry." I whispered as I laid my head on his chest. He kept holding me, but whispered back, "It's okay, I understand."

-

The next morning was really awkward. When all of us got up to make breakfast, Jonathan and I kept our distance. I felt so weird about what happened last night, even though we talked about it.

Charlise eventually pulled me aside when everyone else was busy, making pancakes or shit like that.

"What happened?" Charlise asked, looking kinda concerned.

"What?" I asked, trying to avoid this conversation.

"You know what I'm talking about. You and Jonathan. Why are you avoiding each other?" She asked.

"Well, I don't know. He snuck me out last night and I thought we were just going to chill out, but he kissed me. I didn't kiss back though." I confessed.

Charlise sighed, "Xanthe, are you serious? He obviously likes you back. Why wouldn't you kiss him?"

"Charlise, I'm way too young. And besides, we talked about it and he said he understands and he accepts the fact that I don't really want anything right now, but he does know that I like him." I told her.

"Yeah, but if you keep him waiting, he'll eventually get bored and leave." Charlise smirked and walked back into the kitchen.

I thought about what she just said. I mean, it's not like I told Jon to wait until I'm ready. He can do what he wants, but then again, I like him a lot. Maybe rejecting his kiss might not have been the best idea???

Chapter 8 will be out soon.