Stars Leave Black Holes Behind [HS]

19

The echoed chinks of cutlery and uncomfortable rustles of bags was all there was to hear. It was an awkward silence that passed between them. An ugly silence. A tense silence that built itself up, brick by brick, around Val. Around Harry. Around them all.

She didn't touch her food. The thought of it made her stomach clench as she watched Harry eat easily. It was just too much for her. Too much of him all at once. She sort of just wanted to smash her plate into pieces and walk out of the door.

"So Harry," Zayn began. "Where do you live?"

Harry swallowed slowly, eyes drifting to him from where they had rested on his plate. "London. Just outside of it." He paused, eyes flickering towards Valerie who sat silent and motionless beside Zayn. "And you live here?"

"No, no. I live in the dorms. I just spend most of my time here, you know."

The way he said it made Valerie cringe. This was a time she could feel her dislike for the brown eyed boy creep up her shoulders and slide down her front and sit heavy in her lap like a dead weight.

"Oh. Nice."

"Yeah. So, what's London like then? I've only been there a few times- always thought living there would be a bit scary."

"It's great. I don't live far from my work so it's convenient, and everything is only a train ride away, really. It's just noisy. Never sleeps. Very different from here, you know."

"Where do you work?"

It was all very polite. Forced. And Val felt like someone was pushing splinters through her spine.

"At a film studio- you probably won't have heard of it, it only makes, like, weird short films that no one actually gets the point of."

"A film studio? So you what, make films?"

"Sort of. I do the music for them."

"The music?"

"Yeah, like, the director makes the film and puts together all the footage, and my job is scoring it. So I make the soundtracks and make or edit the music for each scene. It's actually fun."

Valerie couldn't feel her hands anymore. Couldn't see. Couldn't speak. It was like her body was slowly shutting down as he spoke. Every word another switch he was flicking off.

Harry had always wanted to score films. Had always told her whenever they were together the exact song he would have playing right in that moment, if they were in a film. Valerie squeezed her eyes shut. If only they were, and the fucking state she was in was only temporary, and her broken heart was just pretend. Imaginary.

"What about you?"

"Still have no clue, to be honest. I write, but I don't think I can make a living out of that."

"Publishing?"

"Yeah, maybe."

There was another brick-wall silence, and Valerie opened her eyes and stared at her hands. Her knuckles had gone white.

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Song: Terrence Loves You by Lana Del Ray

"I lost myself when I lost you."

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"We have a choice when we wake up of what we can put into the world, and I ask you to please choose love every single day." - Harry Styles

My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone ♡