Stars Leave Black Holes Behind [HS]

24

The door was closed when she reached it. A blank white face staring back at her as she stood, as she waited, as she breathed.

Did she go inside?

Did she knock?

Did she just go and sit back down with Zayn?

She bit her lip, hand reaching out to clasp the door handle.

"Harry?" She called, and his name sounded like warm honey on her tongue. Like melted chocolate. Like heaven. "Are you okay?"

She turned the handle and opened the door, peering inside.

Valerie didn't really think she was ready for what she saw. Didn't think her mind was prepared. Didn't think her heart was.

Because Harry was hunched on the bed, broad shoulders shaking, bony hands covering his face. Heartaching sobs wracked from his body, and Valerie could feel her insides begin to shake. Could feel that sound burrow inside of her, echoing around her skull and embedding itself into her memory forever.

She could feel her tongue corroding inside of her mouth, could feel her teeth shattering inside of her gums, could feel her fucking heart ripping apart inside of her chest.

"Harry?" She breathed, and it was almost silent. An exhale.

Her hands trembled as she approached, all thoughts and feelings forgotten as she sat beside him; worry clawing at her throat as she watched him cry.

As she watched him weep.

Val so wanted to wrap him up in her arms. To fold herself around him like paper. To scoop his sadness out of him like a carved fucking pumpkin and light a candle inside his ribcage to make him glow. She wanted to tell him that his cries made her feel like her bones were snapping in half, like there were thunderstorms swimming inside of her veins, like her nerves were screaming inside of her skin.

She wanted to- but she didn't.

Because they were not Val And Harry anymore. They were not together. They were not in love. They were nothing.

"Harry?" Valerie asked again, fingers itching to touch him - to just fucking touch him - because it had been a whole fucking year, and she was still entirely his, and her heart craved him like a fucking addiction. "Harry what's wrong? Please tell me what's wrong. I- I- Shall I get Zayn? Do you need-"

"I still don't think you get it, do you?"

She stopped, breath hitching in her throat, eyes watching as Harry dropped his hands, his own green eyes staring into hers with so much feeling that Val felt like she could almost see it.

"What? I don't- I don't understand."

"You don't get it."

"Get what, Harry? What don't I get?"

Her voice was a whisper but it sounded like a shout, ringing through her ears, ricocheting off her bones like bullets.

His green eyes darted between hers, searching, in a way Harry had done ever since she had known him.

"That I-"