Desperate

☽ ι'м ѕorry ☾

      Jason still sat on the couch holding Lana's promise ring in his hand clutching it to his chest.

Tear stains and redness brimmed his eyes as he stared at the ring.

'Get up you can't keep feeling sorry for yourself' He thought to himself

'I'm never getting up without Lana what else do I really have to live for' He thought to himself once more

Jason closed his eyes remembering the night he was curled up, weak in a ball, and crying about his miserable life. At that moment he was ready to end it all until Lana, his doll, told him that she loves him. This brought a small smile to the vulnerable Jason and a tear at the same time.

Replaying that moment over again in his head he finally got the courage to get up and walk upstairs to mend the trust he had lost.

With each step his grip tightened on the promise ring until he reached the door way of their bedroom. Catching a glance from Lana he quickly put his head down in shame and walked slowly over to her.

He took a deep breath and sat down at a trustworthy distance from her not wanting to agitate her even more.

"Doll-"

"Lana" She corrected him

A pained expression came across his face "Lana I wanted to apologize to you for my terrible behavior that I inflicted on you because you're absolutely right. You, Lana Bisogn, did not deserve the pain that I put upon you and it's safe to say that I surely don't deserve you"

"And-" Jason's voice cracked due to the breakdown he was about to have in front her

Jason observed the mix of fresh bruises and hickeys that covered Lana's body

"I'm so sorry Lana I love you so much and I realize that in order for us to work I need to get help and I will do that"

Jason was now letting out uncontrollable sobs and brought his legs to his chest "Plea-Please doll give me another chance you won't regret it"

This time she didn't correct him on her nickname but instead realized just how the guilt was eating him away

"Ok" She said holding out her hand

Jason looked up confused as to why she had her hand out "Did you want me to-"

"The ring"

"Oh!" He quickly placed the ring in her hand

Lana placed the ring on the night stand in the same place she use to call Dylan with the home phone

"The ring will go back on my finger whenever I feel like putting it back on, so that means don't force me to put it back on"

"Ok doll thank you so much I lov-" He stopped himself from finishing the sentence

"Thank you"

Lana nodded "So where do we start doll? Do I need to hire a therapist? I'm not really sure where to begin" Jason asked

"How about we start off with the medication that you should have been taking in the first place"

"Ok I'll go and get it" He said getting up from the bed and wiped away his tears that were still rolling down his face

He picked up the water bottle on the night stand and took the required amount.

Jason made a face not liking the taste of the medication but frowned even more remembering the effects it had on him.

He didn't like the aftermath of his medication because it made him 'zombie like'

"So what exactly does this stuff do?" She asked picking up the bottle