Survival 101: With Vivian Bell

Chapter 18: Admitting Is the First Step

The chapter you were all waiting for :D ;)

SSC

You say you don't like it

But I know that you're a liar

'Cause when we kiss

Ooh

Fire

-Fire by Baby Face & Des'ree

I walked out of the infirmary with no direction in mind, except far away from people.

Sweetie there is no point fretting about it now, just admit you can't do these things on your own, there is no harm in it.

Leave me alone.

Leave you? I am the only one here who keeps you rational or have you forgotten that? I warned you, didn't I? I told you not to get attached but what do you do? You go and get distracted.

"What was that?"

I was snapped out of my thoughts by a very pissed of Daryl Dixon that stomped in my direction. I looked around for a way to escape to find that I had managed to corner myself in between two walls.

"What was what?" I demanded trying not to reveal my straying sanity. He approached me and I was irked by his glowering face. I had never seen Daryl look as furious as he did in that moment. With each step he invaded my personal space and before I knew it, I was backed up into the wall.

"What ya pulled back der, runnin off on yer own. Are ya suicidal is that what ya are?"

Is he blaming me? What the fuck?

"I didn't expect those assholes to show up the way they did. I had the situation under control." I snapped I had to practically rise up on to my tip toes to glare up into his piercing blue eyes.

"Under control? Is that what it was?" He hissed "Tha' bastard was cuttin' ya and ya'ere just standin' there."

My mouth fell open in disbelief and shock, to make things worse my eyes stung from the harsh blame in his words.

No. I refuse to cry, especially not in front of him.

"I cannot believe you are giving me shit about this." I hissed, determined not to let the hurt creep into my voice. "You think I am some bimbo scream queen to attract the entire walker neighborhood?"

I looked away, unable to withstand his hounding stare any longer "They were just messing around; they would have let me go eventually."

Daryl's reaction to my words was primitive. I was startled when he roughly grabbed me by the elbow and pulled me to him. I was forced to look upon his scowling face. I was a little terrified by the murderous glint in his eyes. I wasn't entirely sure it was directed at me.

"After they'er done screwin' ya in every possible way." He whispered ruthlessly, making sure to enunciate each word with razor sharp precision. This was dangerous territory, the vicious tone of his voice and stern gaze was scaring me.

Survival instincts combined with an internal rage within me took over. I wrenched my arm free from his bruising grip and looked him dead in the eyes "I don't need this, any of it. I was fine on my own I had everything under control but ever since you came in with your cross bow and your fucking red-neck superiority complex, my life has been a spiraling black hole of bullshit."

I was aware of my rise of pitch in my voice but I didn't care, I wasn't going to let him get away with talking to me with such audacity.

Daryl reeled back as if my words had physically slapped him. His shock was for a moment before that rage took over once more and he snarled at me. "Before I came in? Yer life was shit long befor' ya met me."