Silent Music

Chapter 17

My legs are in pain from sitting but I got 8 hours to go so rip me.  Also, phones dying send help.  Waaaaaaa

Jimin's POV

I wasn't sure how I was supposed to feel right now.  I was happy, but also sad, and yet also angry.

I didn't like what I was being told since I had no say in it.

Go to America for a month with a program and you'll come back and almost never have to sign again...

But that means I have to go to America for a month without Yoongi or any of my friends and I didn't get a say in it...

I knew it would be better to go and come back with almost perfect speech but still.  I was scared to tell everyone.

What if Yoongi wanted to break up because we just started dating and now I'm leaving...

I felt tears fill my eyes as I thought about him leaving me...  I wouldn't blame him but would he really want to stay if I couldn't really talk..?

Grumbling I flipped the covers over my head and let the tears flow out.  I knew I wasn't being subtle about my crying and that it would make my mom feel bad but I was sad...

I leave in a week...  not much time to tell him and if I wait till the last minute it'll be worse.

I spent the night giving myself panic attacks and imagining all the bad things instead of the good which caused me to get zero sleep.

When morning came I grumbled a goodbye and dragged myself to school.

I looked like a wreck.  My hair was hidden under a baseball cap and I was in Yoongi's hoodie and jeans with old converse.

The thing that gave me away was my red eyes and dark circles.  My lips were raw from chewing on them and my nails were bitten to a very short length.

I was scared to tell anyone, but I was terrified to tell Yoongi.

I barely made it through my classes with no energy or care left in me.  Finally it was when I would bug Yoongi in his class since I didn't have one but instead I went into a bathroom.

He texted me and asked me if I was coming or not and soon I was thrown in a group chat.

Jimin why do you look like you cried all night?
-MamaJin

Yo, why did you ignore me in the hall?
-Namjoon Hyung

Dude what's wrong?  You look like death.
-Hoseok

Jiminie where are you?
-Yoongs

I'll explain after school, meet me in the dance room.
-Jimin

Sighing I silenced my phone and held my shaking hands together.  You can do it Jimin... they won't be that mad...?

After school ended I forced my legs to leave the bathroom and I slowly walked to the dance room.

Yoongi, Jin, Namjoon, Hoseok, Jungkook, and Taehyung were all in there looking worried.

I entered with my head down and gave them a small wave tears already leaving my eyes as I saw them.

Yoongi hugged me tightly and I hugged him back missing his warmth.  How could I got a month without this?

"What happened?"  Jin asked me with a sad face.

I sniffled and sighed before clearing my throat.

"I can't say it all... Jin would you translate it?"  I asked knowing Taehyung, Namjoon, and Hoseok wouldn't know what I was signing.

Jin nodded and I sighed again before signing.

"My mom is sending me to America for a month... I leave Monday.  I will be in a vocal camp and I'm supposed to come back with perfect speaking."  I signed blinking back anymore tears.

"Jimin that's great for you!  Do you not want to improve your speaking?"  Jungkook asked and Yoongi just watched me.

"I don't want... to leave.  You all.  And no more Yoongi hugs."  I mumbled and they all smiled at me.

Soon they were all hugging me and laughing.

"We will be here when you get back and you can call us anytime!!!"  Hoseok said and I sighed.

Yoongi hadn't talked though, I needed him to promise not to leave me or I would just run away and not go...

"Don't do that idiot.  I wouldn't leave you and you can't run away!  I told you I loved you and I'll just wait until you're back and able to tell me how much you missed me in great detail."  Yoongi said flicking my ear before nuzzling me into a hug.

I didn't mean to say that but I'm glad I did.  I smiled and hug Yoongi back tightly.

"I love you too."  I said and Jin cooed at the moment.

"Go home and get some rest you look like a zombie."  Namjoon said and I chuckled.

I nodded and slowly walked out.  After a few minutes Yoongi was walking with me.

"I want cuddles."  He said and I smiled.

Once at my house we went to my room and proceeded to cuddle.  I fell asleep quickly using Yoongi as a pillow and I smiled in my sleep as he played with my hair.

It'll be okay, and soon I'll be normal.  I thought as the days went by.