Unimagined | Colby Brock

•CHAPTER 21•

Alyx pov:

*2 years later*

It was 2 years ago today that Colby was shot right in front of me whilst Sam, Colby, Kat and I were all filming a YouTube overnight challenge video for Sam and Colby's channel. We expected that night to be scary and a little dangerous but never did I expect that the love of my life and the only person I'd ever love would be shot in front of me.

I'm now 23. I live back in Scotland. Alone.

That night, Colby died.

So did I, mentally anyway.

I couldn't deal with the pain or the reality of it. I decided what was best for me was to go to the funeral and then move back to Scotland. So that's what I did.

I haven't seen Sam, Colby, Kat, Corey, Devyn, Aaron or Elton since the day of the funeral, I haven't talked to them and I haven't reached out. Despite their many attempts to stop me from moving back to Scotland I ignored all of their calls and all of their pleads and changed my number so they couldn't contact me. No, I didn't move back with or near my family. I also haven't seen my family in 2 years.

Let's put it easier, I haven't seen anybody that knew about Colby & I since 2 years ago. I deleted social media and isolated myself completely. I couldn't handle the pain, I couldn't handle everyone saying 'sorry for your loss' and I couldn't handle being reminded how the only person I actually loved, was dead. I made sure that everyone knew I was alive and safe but for a long time I wished I wasn't alive and safe, I wanted to be with him and I was willing to do whatever that took.

I now live in a small apartment with my dog  and keep my distance from pretty much everyone all together. I still cry at the sound of Colbys name and crying seems to be the only way to deal with the pain, it's been 2 years and it's still as hard as it was the first day. I moved to forget everything that happened in LA. I pretend that, that part of my life didn't happen, well I try to trick my brain to believe that.

I regret it..being one hundred percent honest. I regret leaving LA and regret leaving Sam, Kat, Corey, Devyn, Elton and Aaron. I think I made that decision out of hurt and denial, I denied and still deny to accept that he is gone. So instead, every single day of my life I wake up and pretend I never met Colby, pretend I never met any of them, pretend I never moved to LA and pretend that I never fell face first hard in love with Colby Brock.

You might be thinking..what about Kat? Yeah I even left her behind in LA too, just like I did with the everyone else, I lost complete contact. I can't stand to think of Sam's reaction to Colbys death, I think he was just about as heart broken as me. Sam and Colby were best friends since they were teens and they went through so much together. I occasionally find myself unable to pretend my life in LA didn't happen, and I sometimes check the Sam and Colby channel. Although it doesn't run anymore because well..there is no Colby..so Sam explained and stopped making videos I still find myself re watching that video of Sam breaking down telling everyone that Colby was dead and watching their old videos.

It's so difficult to ignore it.

I really wish I hadn't left, I wish I had stayed. Those people were my best friends and my only friends, I love them more than anything. I also miss LA every single day, I hate Scotland so much and being here reminds me of my pain but I could never return to LA. Everything in me wants to go back but I don't know where they live, do they all live together still? Or do they live apart? Are Sam and Kat still together? Is Elton and Amanda still together? Is Corey and Devyn still together? Are any of them married? Do any of them have kids? Do they still do Youtube? I could probably just check their channels but i can't handle the pain, I can't deal to see how great their lives are and see everything I gave up. Leaving is the biggest regret of my life. I also can't return because where would I live? What would my career be? And would they even want me?

I dread to think about that last question..would they even still recognise me, would they hate me, would they refuse to have me there after I ran away from them and left. I think I'd be too embarrassed and it's 2 years too late to return.

For these past 2 years I've been writing a book..yup pretty different for me. The book is the only thing with any meaning to me. It is called 'Unimagined' and it is a book telling the exact story of me moving to LA with Kat, me meeting Colby, Colby and I dating, the night Colby died and basically my whole time in LA (this fanfic is the book she wrote if you haven't picked that up yet lmao). Although nobody knows that the book is a real story..no one knows it's my life and no one ever will. Unless Sam, Kat, Corey, Elton, Devyn, Aaron, Amanda, my family, Colbys family or any of the thousands of viewers see it..I hadn't totally thought about what I would do if anyone did link it all together and find me.

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I walked into my publicists office nervously, ready to talk to her.

"Are you ready for the book release tomorrow Alyx?" She excitedly said.

"Yeah" I replied with no enthusiasm.

The book was about to be released tomorrow morning after 2 years of writing and editing to make it perfect.

"So Alyx, I must ask, who is Colby Brock?" She asked me.

"Nobody, it's a made up story. Colby Brock isn't a real person" I replied pretending once again..

THE END