Essays, Etc.

Endings, Etc.

So this is it.

This is the last essay I’m writing, the last documentation of my life I will (probably) ever put to paper. I’m too private for this.

I’ve moved on too much from this.

Many people asked me why I did this, why I decide to get on such a personal level with so many of my readers and open up my wounds to them. My answer is always the same: knowing that someone else is going through the same kind of pain you are helps, even if it’s just a little.

That’s all I wanted to do with this.

To help.

To maybe make you laugh a little, to make you think about serious topics a little more skewed and show that there are a lot of different ways of approaching life, and not all of them have to be as dark and brutal as the politicians and news would like.

So now it’s time to reflect, I suppose.

Since I started writing these, I have:

*Been depressed

*Considered suicide many times

*Gotten through all of those times with support and personal forms of redemption

*Written stories that made me friends

*Gotten to know a girl that’s pretty damn cool named Jude

*Realized that maybe I’m gay

*Realized I’m gay

*Ate a sandwich to get over the fact that I’m gay

*Accepted said fact

*Came out to family

*Watched as the girl I was in love with fell for someone else

*Decided to live life with a “fuck this” attitude and told her how I felt

*Got together with said female

*Finished two books

*Watched my popularity grow

*Fixed my grades

*Helped some friends who were in some trouble

*Realized that maybe life isn’t so bad, after all

The point in all of this?

To tell you that it gets better.

No matter how bad it is for you, how dark and lonely the nights get, how lonely you feel every morning, how every ounce of food seems to stick in your throat until you give up on eating, how every word you write down seems empty and trite and cheap and worthless, it will get better.

It will.

I’m in a better place than I have ever been, with a loving girlfriend who supports me, an amazing family and group of friends, and all of the support and love I could ever ask for.

So keep going.

Everything falls into place in time.

I promise.

Forever Yours,

WooWoo