Feeding From The Night

Chapter 12: A Personal Drug

I sat on my sofa and looked at the papers covering my wall, the markings I had made, the small discoveries I had made. I was so set on findng out who she was but there was no need too anymore, it was just to pass time. When I had Gatubela in my life, I didn't need anything to pass time, because I had her to keep my life new and exciting. 

But she was gone now. 

I don't know what happened. We were arguing one moment and the next she had gone. Were we over now? What was I supposed to do? I have now way of contacting her. She is definately hiding something from me. I don't need this. I don't need lies. I admit I love a good mystery but not in a relationship. I don't need to feel like this.

But the thing is, I do need her. 

I stormed towards my wall and began tearing my work away from the wallpaper, my anger bubbling inside of me, I errupted. Stormng around the house tearing down any evidence I had found of my - no the mystery girls existence.  I never lost my temper, never, I was the cool collected type, always finding logic in something to keep myself calm, but I was beginning to lose it now. 

She was my drug, I was addicted and I didnt want to let go of it now. I needed her in my life, my life was complete when she was in it, there had always been something missing before she came along. I was always the boy that wanted to be alone, the person that everyone looked down on as I could of had many girls, but I had always turned them down. They were never right. Maybe if she had left me near the beginning of our relationship I would of been fine, but this was 3 months into it now. I was attatched and I really did love her. We had a connection, no...we still have a connection like no other I have ever known. I love everything about her, her voluptuous curves, ridiculous sense of humour, the way her eyes would light up when I complimented her or mentioned our future together, her romantic kisses...I love everything about her. Including her perfect imperfections. 

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