When Two Ends Meet//LRH

11

And I promised myself I wouldn't let you complete me.

They need to go away. They need to stop right now. I can't hear them anymore, they are making me sick to my stomach. It's to the point where I can't write down people's conversations anymore because my brain is flooded with my own. My own past conversations. I can't think of random analogies and future goals or how I am myself to understand myself more. I can only focus on right now because right now I want them gone. Gone Amy. I screw my eyes shut and clench my jaw. Go the fuck away. I need to find Luke. I really need Luke.

I don't know why but lately every time I'm around Luke the voices disappear. I don't care to be with him or necessarily enjoy his presence, but he can make them go away temporarily so I'll take it. It's just me using him. Nothing more. He won't complete me. I swear I won't let him complete me.
-
I see her approaching me rather fast in the hall. I obviously go with it but I still check around to make sure none of the jocks are around. Should I ask her about her and Ethan?

"Hey." She states simply.

"Oh. Hey." I try and let her know I'm confused.

She doesn't say anything. Just stares. I remember what she said that day in the library when Dylan was there. 'I don't like your eyes. But I didn't say I didn't like your lips, or your nose, or your jawline, or your hair, or your height, or your ridiculously cute smile.' That was probably the only reason I got out of bed for the past week.

-
Voices. Gone. Mission accomplished.

I don't know, it was something about his eyes. I could stare at them and hear the whispers going down all the way to disappearing completely. They make me focus on something other my head for a little. There is something new about them everyday. Like I can study them as a scientist forever and never find what I originally wanted, because every day I'd run into something new that I wanted the answer too. It wasn't just his eyes though. It was everything. I said before that I didn't like his eyes yet I liked his lips and how they were shaped and they're perfect pigmented colour for his skin tone, I loved how his nose points upwards and how narrow the bone leading up to the cartilage is. His jawline isn't the sharpest thing I've ever seen, but that isn't what matters. What matters is that's what structures his entire face which I can't find a flaw in yet. His hair is the freaking cutest thing I've ever seen in my life. I remember freshman year, he had this quiff going on. Now his hair just falls on his head, really short sides and longer top which makes his curls pop out and always look like he just woke up. It was the cutest how he could look like a little boy who just woke up on Christmas morning even while being 6'4. Which is what he said but I'm sure he's 6'5 or a little over now. He has grown. I see his smirk right now as I'm staring. His smirk is nothing compared to when he actually smiles and you see his dimples. Or when he's really excited and scrunches his nose, pulls his tongue in between his teeth before he smiles.

My voices had already left, I should have left. But on today's episode of Amber the scientist, I found out I really don't mind those eyes. The one flaw I thought he had. On tomorrow's episode, find out how he doesn't have a flaw. Or bring one out of him. Oh wait. He's not Dylan. Shit.
-

I have to ask her now because I hear the boys walking out of the locker room.

"Why did you call Ethan Lovey yesterday?"

"Hey Dylan!" She exclaimed as she walked right by me to go to Dylan, ignoring every thing I just said.

"Guess who broke up with bitch face today?" I hear him say. Please tell me I'm dreaming.

"No way!" Amber said excitedly. "Took you long enough!" She poked his cheek. His really structured cheek.

He wrapped his arm around her and walked down the hall with the crowd of his team around all them as usual. Their varsity jackets with their jersey numbers and last names. I miss my jacket. Amber looks back at me and point to Ethan's, who happens to be beside her, back. Loveheart
30

Once she sees the look of reassurance on my face she winks at me. I lean back againest my locker and crack a smile. I better be careful. She can easily break a heart. She broke her own, why would she stop at me? Then again, she could just break a Loveheart.