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February

For a month, Herbert Weber and Clara had been a couple. I knew Jacob blamed me to some degree, but at least they were happy together. I got an earful from Clara on the way home from Hitler Youth meetings; we walked together now. Often our teachers said it was dangerous for girls to walk alone, and our parents agreed.
      "You know, he says he loves me," Clara said dreamily.
     "Really?" I was staring into space, I didn't care particularly.
     "And he's with the other boys training to be a soldier. He's so strong now, the other day he swept me off the floor and didn't even bat an eye." It was true that Herbert had grown into his arms and legs in the past month a bit, but he was no Hercules. He was still shy and quiet, awkward in conversation. "You know, we could be married one day."
      "We're too young to think of things like that," I responded hotly.
     She rolled her eyes, "don't tell me you never wonder about it. Your dress, the groom..."
     I shrugged, "maybe."
     "Do you imagine it's my brother?"
     I felt my face burn. "Who, Karl?" I tried hopelessly to act as though I didn't understand where she was going. I kicked some snow off the curb, trying to act nonchalant.
"No, stupid! Jacob." She paused, as if waiting for me to say something before rambling on. "We could be sisters, if you did. Sisters-in-law, but that's basically the same thing." I couldn't help but smile at the thought. "See? You really ought to think more about these things-" she stopped. I turned, now about a pace a half in front of her.
"What is it?"
"I don't feel well," she mumbled.
"Just all of the sudden?" I asked. She nodded, face pure white. "Do you want to-" before I could finish, she had dropped her bag and shot down the nearest ally. "Clara, wait!" I called, chasing after her, my school bag banging into my back with each stride. "Clara-" I stopped when I heard gagging and saw her shoes poking from behind a crate. Against my better judgement, I dropped my bag and ran behind her, catching up her hair as she lost the remains of her dinner. When she was finished, I re-braided her hair and helped her stand. I looped my arm over her shoulders and scooped up my bag as well as her own when we came to the sidewalk.
"My house is closer, we can go there and get you cleaned up before you head home." She nodded meekly and let me lead the way.
"I don't even know what it was-" Clara choked, a tear streaming down her face.
"Shh, it's alright."
Another two minutes of walking and I was half dragging her up the back steps. Nudging open the kitchen door with my elbow, I saw Mama's form slouched over the table. I didn't bother her, thinking she was resting, and took Clara to the bathroom. I helped her unbutton her shirt and left it to soak, giving her one of mine to borrow.
"It won't quite close," she said softly. Clara had always had more curves than I did but normally my shirts would fit her.
"It'll be good enough if you wear your coat over it." She nodded and sighed gratefully when I pressed a cool cloth to her forehead. "You don't feel warm," I murmured, perplexed.
She shrugged, "maybe it's something I ate, then." I nodded. We stayed sitting in silence until a knock came to the door. I glanced in on Mama before opening it; she now had her head in her hands.
"Karl?" I said with genuine surprise. It had been a while since I had seen him. The young fourteen year old I remembered from two years ago was now much taller, with a strong jaw and angry looking eyes.
"Is my sister here?"
"Yes, I'll go get her," but when I turned Clara was already at the bottom of the stairs. "She's sick." I stated lamely. He nodded, thanked me, and left with Clara. It was odd, but I didn't question it. "Mama?" I entered the kitchen tentatively, "Mama? How about I read to you a bit?"
"Oh. Yes that would be lovely." Her eyes were blank, almost glazed over. I picked up the paper resting half opened on the table. Katze's head popped up from my mother's lap. At least someone had been comforting her.
"The United States-"
"Why is the paper writing about the United States?" She asked, staring blankly.
"They joined the war in December, Mama. You remember, it was on the radio." Mama continued to stare blankly. "Japan invaded that little island by the United States. I forget what it was called...anyway, they joined."
"Oh, yes, yes," she stood from the table and passed me the cat. "That's enough for today."
"But I just got started-"
"I said that's enough!" she snapped. I blinked in shock, it wasn't often Mama raised her voice. Her head dropped between her shoulders. "Go finish your school work." I nodded, though she had turned and couldn't see me.
________
     A week or so after Clara had gotten sick, Jacob knocked on my door.
     "Clara asked me to come get you," he said grimly.
     "Is she still sick?" I asked, buttoning my coat.
      He paused, "not necessarily."
      I stopped and stared at him a moment, but he had been so cryptic lately that I didn't bother to seriously question it. As we walked, he caught my hand and held it fast in his own.
     "What are we?" I asked softly.
     "What do you mean?"
     Tactfully, I formed a response. "I mean, we hold hands, we've kissed, we've been friends for years. I was wondering if maybe we were...something more." A moment of silence that felt like an eternity passed between us. "I'm sorry, if you don't feel the same way-"
      "Nein."
      I felt my heart sink a bit, "alright."
       "Nein, I mean, I feel the same way. We could...try it, maybe." He sighed, "ordinarily, Frauen don't ask Männer. It's the other way around." He chuckled, "but I supposed my girlfriend is no ordinary girl."
       I couldn't help but blush, "girlfriend. I like that." It was the kind of fluff and romance that sounded as though it came right from the movies I hated, but today, I didn't seem to mind. I was growing up, I guess.
     "Well, here we are," Jacob sighed and stared up at his house. For a family with so many children and one grandchild who was just barely a year old, it was oddly silent. I pushed open the door and hung up my coat; I had been here so frequently over the years that Frau Rheder didn't mind my comings and goings.
      "Is she in her room?" Jacob nodded as he hung up his hat. I took the steps two at a time and turned left to where I knew Clara would be. She sat in bed, more willowy and pale than I remembered.
      "Alina," she said with some surprise. I smiled and sat on the edge of the bed.
     "Are you feeling any better?" I asked. She closed the book she had open on her lap and laid it beside her.
      "I suppose Jacob didn't tell you."
      My brow furrowed in confusion, "tell me what? He did mention you weren't exactly sick but that was all."
       "Alina....I'm pregnant."
      My heart fluttered with shock. "Are you...are you sure?"
      She nodded. "I've been sick for weeks, I missed my period, I saw the doctor. I'm pregnant."
      "Have you told Herbert?"
      At this she nodded and smiled. "Last night. He proposed then and there. Oh I know what you're thinking, I'm seventeen and he's nineteen but it's alright. He's old enough, and if my mother fills out the legal papers we can be married. He doesn't have money for a ring but it's alright; we're happy."
       Surely if they don't have money for a ring they don't have money for a child, I thought, but suppressed my feelings with a cheery smile.  "I'm so glad that you're happy! When will you be married?"
      "As soon as possible, of course. That's why I asked you to come. You see, I was wondering if you would be my bridesmaid."
      "But what about Leni?"
      "She's already married, and you're practically my sister already. Will you do it?"
      Alright, I had always wanted to be a bridesmaid. I had always imagined being one to one of my closer friends, or perhaps Otto's bride. Not like this, exactly, but...fine. I pasted on another smile to hide my shock, "of course!"
       She grinned. "And you know, I'm not at all upset about the pregnancy."
       "Really?" Curious; I would be mortified, but that was Clara for you. She didn't care so much what other people thought.
      "No, not at all. You see, I'm doing my part to support the Fürher. He needs soldiers. If the baby is a boy, he'll be a soldier. If it's a girl, she will be mother to more soldiers. And we are continuing the pure, Aryan race. When you think about it, we're doing everything right."
       I tried to mask my shock with a  sickly sweet tone. "Do you really think this war will last that long?"
      Clara's face darkened. "I know what you're thinking. You don't mind the baby, or me getting me married, but you do mind that I'm doing this for Hitler. But why shouldn't I? He gave my father his job back after the Americans and the British destroyed us. We were all starving, the whole country, before him. Or have you forgotten? We have every reason to be grateful. We are no longer the oppressed people that we were and I, for one, will raise my child to be grateful for that precious gift of life that Hitler has given us."
      "My brother was killed fighting his war. My other brother was stolen from us by his soldiers, and you want me to be grateful?"
      Clara took my hands. "I know it's difficult. My father has left for the war and I worry about him every day. But your brother died for a greater cause than himself; he died so Germans could be free. And Jan, well, he was a part of the race that is destroying Germany. He's just a little boy, the Nazis won't harm him. I am sure that he is safe. The Jews just...need to be taken away while Germany regains its strength, you see?"
     I forced myself to nod as if I understood. It was bad enough that I had spoken against the Nazis in front of Clara who was, apparently, a devout follower. No need to make the situation any more dangerous by disagreeing. "I'm sorry to be speaking badly about the Fürher on such a happy occasion. You're going to be married soon! We need to start planning!"

.....
Yes, teen pregnancy was common in Nazi Germany. On a lighter note, I'm thinking of setting Saturdays as my main day to update. Summer is coming and I'll have more time. Please comment and vote, see you next week!
~Statzy