Boys Don't Cry ✵ MCR

Lindsey Ballato

     Elation. Complete and utter elation. The tourniquet is removed and the back of my head hits the floor. I can't help but laugh and scream. My blood is poisoned and the beautiful parts go straight to my brain, while the toxic residue will remain in my bloodstream. Every breath heavier than the next, weighted down with perfection. Sometimes I regret my addiction, that's just society talking, it's times like now that all that regret goes away because, oh god it's the best.

I open my eyes to see the bright sun and start muttering.

"Sunday. A day of sun. The seventh day of the week. The first day of the week. No work. No work for any of us. Nope. None. Why is everything so bright? Perhaps because it's Sunday, where there's loads of sun. It's raining. It's Sunday. Does this mean it should be renamed Rainday? That sounds funny. I would like to listen to music now. I enjoy music, it is nice. Whom shall I listen to? Whom is a funny word, whom, whom, whom."

I shoot upwards and throw myself over to the record player. Lindsey brought home something new last night, the album is called I Love Rock 'N Roll by Joan Jett And The Blackhearts, what a classic. I like them, they always make me feel like I'm in a movie. I stare at the album cover for a while.

"She looks like Lindsey, except Lindsey likes pigtails, never a mullet. I like Lindsey, she thinks se's all hardcore and she isn't wrong but I love how she brings me music. I love that Mikey pretends to be emotionless and mean but he's actually a little softie. And Frank is very truthful, I love his jokes and I love his tattoos, I think he's going to run out of skin soon! This group is love. Concentrated love. Concentration bordering on poisonous amounts of love. Love enough to whither your veins. No blood, just love! Love, love, love!"

I place the record on the turntable and carefully put the needle at the edge of the vinyl, I make sure the volume is low so the others don't wake up. It starts of with that iconic drum beat and that classic riff.

"I saw him dancing there by the record machine.."

Very quietly I begin to sing. A little louder during the first chorus. I slightly heighten the volume on the machine, but not too much. I guess I can sing somewhat louder. I lie down and unintentionally start stomping the beat.

"With me, Yeah me!"

Joan sang.

"I love rock 'n roll, some come and take a dime and dance with me!"

I couldn't help myself. By the end of the song I was thrashing about the floor belting the iconic song. Once the next song began, I realised what I had done and immediately turned off the player. Lindsey was standing behind it with an expression that could cut someone. The way the light was hitting her gave her the essence of a vampire. Black hair in pigtails and skin pale as bone.

"Hi Lindsey."

"What the Hell was that?"

"Music?"

"Gerard, you're insane."

Mikey lifts his arms into the air and begins to yell,

"I LOVE ROCK 'N ROLL!"

Frank replied at the exact same volume.

"SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH!"

Lindsey looks at me and I know exactly what to do. I turn the volume all the way up and yet again place the needle at the beginning of the record. The song blasts and by the end everyone is singing, Frank included. We're all laughing. These are the best times. No one works on Sundays, we sleep in and listen to records, maybe shoot up a little and just have a good time in general.

"You know guys, I really love you."

Lindsey sighs.

"We love you too!"

Frank practically jumps on her and the four of us hug.

"Oh! Mikey! Your birthday is next week! Are you ready to become twenty?"

Lindsey sits on the floor.

"Oh god, personally, I don't think it's that big of a deal Gee you're what, twenty three, Frank you're eighteen next month, right?"

"Yeah,"

"And Lindsey, you're twenty five. So, I don't think age particularly matters at this point."

"That's fair."