I AM TOBIAS AND I AM DIVERGENT

Chapter 1 (actually 6 in book)

   I stand at the net. Then, as expected, a blur rains down from the sky. But there are two things unusual about this particular jump. One, this initiate is silent. No screams or cries of terror, only a muted decent from the ledge hundreds of feet above. Two, this particular blob, this person, is wearing gray. Abnegation. I can't decide between admiring the Stiff's guts, pitying them because they don't know what they signed up for, and wondering how on earth I'm going to train this recruit. After what seems like hours, the transfer hits the net. Of all things I expected, a laugh was not one of them. It was beautiful and melodious, but I wouldn't dare say that out loud. She grabs a hand to help her off, my hand to be specific. She rolls, only missing the floor because I catch her, gripping her arms. A small shock comes through our connected skin and I immediately let go.
   "Thank you," I can feel her gaze on me, taking in everything that has to do with her first moments as a Dauntless.
   "Can't believe it," Lauren calls from behind us, "A Stiff, first to jump? Unheard of."
   "There's a reason she left them Lauren," I counter, slightly irritated. Turning back to the girl, I ask  "What's your name?"
    "Um..." she hesitates, likely wanting a new start, which begins with a new name.
   "Think about it" I smile, remembering my first day, "you don't get to pick again"
   "Tris," she decides, and I'll admit I'm intrigued. My curiosity isn't about the name, though that's part of it, it's just her. Though she's not necessarily pretty, there's something about her that demands attention. She's small and she's abnegation, yet she's the first jumper. Two years ago I was in similar circumstances, but I was last. She's already proven to be brave, by not only jumping, but doing so with grace and dignity. But i also see the curiousity and intellegence sparking in her eyes, not just the adrenaline. Though I don't know her, I want to. I'm drawn to this girl in an unexplainable way that I doubt will be leaving me anytime soon, and  frankly, that scares me.
   Lauren pulls me out of my thoughts by telling me to announce it, so I do.  "First jumper- Tris!"
   All of the other jumps pass by in a blur, and for some strange reason, Tris lingers in my mind. I find myself glancing, and even staring, at her more than once.  Finally working up my courage, I walk up to her, and place my hand on her back.
   "Welcome to Dauntless."

...

Wow! So that was the first chapter of my first fanfiction! All constructive criticism is greatly appreciated (as well as complements) and for anyone who actually reads this, I'll try to update on weekends, maybe faster,  considering this was written in one night. And let's just say I'm a major nerd/fangirl/hopeless romantic so mushy and cute things to come. *cue squealing*

.