Melt for me

Chapter sixteen

                                                            **Jack**

All the servants bow when we enter the dinning room. "Welcome Queen Elsa." Elsa smiles sweetly and nods at each one, making sure they each know that she knows that they exist. I don't really pay attention to any of them. My eyes are on the stacks of pancakes, the mouth watering, syrup oozing, fluffy stacks of pancakes.  

There are chocolate chip, apple cinnamon  and god knows what else kind of flavor. Each looking more delicious than the last.    I wipe my mouth, hoping that I don't look like a drooling moron in front of Elsa.  The servants put a plate in front of each large wooden chair. Elsa takes a seat and gestures for me to sit down, earning a couple of quizzical looks from the servants. I don't blame them.

If my Queen was making hand gestures at air, I would think she has gone mad.  I sit across from her, thinking it might be the more gentleman way of going. A butler quickly hurries over, pulling out Elsa's seat for her. I slap my forehead. Why the hell didn't I think of that? Hello, she is a Queen!  She is used to the finer things in life, not being treated like a regular girl. Ugh... I am so stupid. 

Elsa flounces in the seat graceful as ever, her dress folding neatly beside her.  I don't even know how she manages to look so regal and beautiful sitting at the table waiting to be served her breakfast. Her jaw is set in a determined sort of way and I know that her mind is else way. Her bright blue eyes flash every so often, indicating that something is troubling her.

I awkwardly try and reach across the table, to comfort her. She looks up at me and I quickly make it look like I was only grabbing a fork. She raises her eye brows. I let out a high laugh, that some what sounds like a girl. I am stupid, I am stupid, I sound  so fake and ugh.

A young servant with shaking hands puts a pancake on Elsa's plate, nearly almost missing and putting it in her lap. "OH! I am so sorry your highness!" The young boy says bowing frantically, which almost results in Elsa having orange juice in her hair. Elsa waves it away with a small smile on her face. "Its alright, no harm done really. Can anyone tell me if my sister or Kristoff is awake?" She says shaking her head at the offer of orange juice.

The young boy shakes her head, a little too eager to help Elsa. "No my Queen there still... um fast asleep."  Elsa laughs; "Don't worry. I'm sure once Anna smells food she will be down here any second."  When Elsa  talks the boy hangs on to every word, nodding and clutching his hands together. For some reason I am  irritated by his very presence. I even start tapping my fingers on the table, trying to get Elsa's attention.

It works.

Elsa looks at me, her blue eyes taking in every single detail of my face.  "Excuse me Gavin?" For a second I think the boy might faint. I make barfing sounds. Elsa doesn't pay me any attention this time, which quite frankly pisses me off, just a little...(okay maybe a bit more than I let on but what's it to you?) "Y-y-yes your majesty..?"  Elsa leans her face into her hands. "Can you put some pancakes on Olaf's plate? I think he might be coming early...perhaps."  Gavin doesn't even question it but comes and hurries over to me, putting   four HUGE pancakes on the plate in front of me, also filling up a tall glass of orange juice.

Elsa smiles and waves away the servants. "Thank you that will be all," She says with the most queen like smile I have ever seen her do. Gavin practically trips over himself on the way out, earning him a cuff on the ear from a older looking butler.  They shut the door, silently as possible.

Elsa glares at me from across the table and folds her arms across her chest. I look at her, baffled on how quickly her moods can change. "What?" I ask.  Elsa's face hardens. "You know what! You were acting so rude to Gavin, glaring at him."  I roll my eyes. "Come on Elsa did you see the way he stared at you?"  Elsa's turn to roll her eyes. "Will you shut up. Gavin is an old friend of mine.... we used to be play mates, you know before.." She says drifting off, looking at her hands. I have no idea how she can make you feel so angry in one second then feeling completely crummy in the other.

Now I feel like its my fault.

"Look.. Elsa I'm sorry.." "Jack, just shut up and eat your pancakes..." She says pointing her fork at me menacingly.  I hold up my hands; "Okay, okay. Eating and shutting up now,"  I say stuffing pancakes in my mouth. 

If heaven ever decided to be  a food, it would be this. The pancakes melt in my mouth, leaving  behind the taste of brown sugar  and happiness.  I don't usually eat, I mean I am immortal. There is no need for things like food or bathroom breaks. So in the rare time I do eat, I may or may not... what is the word... over eat?

I stuff pancake after pancake in my over sized mouth. Elsa picks at her food, pushing it around on her plate.  "What's your problem?" I ask and to my horror spit some food out while I talk. Meh, I'm a pig what are you going to do about it.

Elsa wipes away a speck of food that landed on her face. "Nothing Jack, its just that I'm kind of stressed out right now."  I cock my head to the side and swallow the food that's in my mouth, to avoid spitting on Elsa again. "Why are you stressed.. I mean your Queen, you have everything you want."

Elsa looks down at her plate, her lips set in a think straight  line. "Not everything..." She says quietly. "Not my freedom."  The word hangs in the air, making the atmosphere a little bit dark. I swallow my pancakes, it no longer tastes good. "I don't understand..." I say slowly. "Not many people do.." She says darkly.

This. This right here breaks my heart. Because I know what that feels like. The feeling of pure nothingness, fear and regret.  The weld up inside of you like some sort of storm of chaos, building and building until you can't hold back any longer and just when your standing on the cliff of solitude, ready to give up everything you have or ever will have. Hope brings you back, a small dose of it but none the less. I don't know what's worse.

Dyeing inside day by day, slowly as it takes a bit of you each day. Or have it all come crashing down at once. 

What's it like being seen as a monster Queen when in reality your too weak to even stand on your own?

"Hey didn't you promise to give me a  tour of the town?" I say, trying to lighten the mood. Elsa bites her bottom lip. "Yeah.. I guess I did."  "Yes you did. Now be a good Queen and show your loyal subject around. Give him the private tour..." I say raising my eye brows. Elsa laughs. Making me smile.

I knew I had to protect Elsa from monsters. But how can I protect her from the monsters inside?