Star Trek One-Shots!!

2. Co-Captains [Spork]

A second one. Yay! :D

This one is shorter and (hopefully) funnier than the last one, although I personally thought the last one was pretty hilarious...enjoy!

*

"I'm the captain!"

"I believe you are mistaken. It is most logical that I am the captain of this ship."

As one could tell, Kirk and Spock were having a bit of an argument.

Their argument made sense, though—the position of commander of the U.S.S. Enterprise had changed hands so much recently, especially between the two of them, that no one was really sure who was the captain anymore. (Seriously. How did the directors deal with it? Kirk had no earthly idea.)

"Come on! I'm captain!" Kirk insisted. He looked at the Vulcan with big puppy dog eyes.

"That is a low blow indeed, James," Spock replied stiffly. Jim knew that he couldn't resist the puppy eyes...but Spock somehow managed to this once. He opened his mouth to launch a lengthy explanation of just why he should be captain...backed with evidence, even.

Kirk groaned. "Save the long speeches for when I'm having trouble sleeping! And call me Jim, dammit!" He whipped his head around to look at McCoy and Scotty. "C'mon! I should be the captain, guys! Back me up!"

Bones frowned and shook his head adamantly. "Leave me out of this one, Jim." He had no desire to get on Spock's bad side (not that it was really a "bad side," per se,) as those that did were usually subjected to the horrendous tortures of long ramblings about the most boring intellectual topics in the universe and-slash-or subjected to the Vulcan nerve pinch.

"Such a good friend you are, Bones," Kirk harrumphed. He glared at Spock. "Why can't you just be as submissive as you were the other night and let me be captain?!"

Sulu clapped his hands over an innocent Chekov's ears. "Whoa. We did not need to know that."

The rest of the crew assembled at the bridge nodded in emphatic agreement.

The tips of Spock's ears turned a bit green in embarrassment, but he refused to acknowledge Kirk's low blow. Instead, Spock reluctantly began to suggest a compromise, in an attempt to keep his boyfriend from further disclosing their...erm, private life.

"James—Jim, if I may suggest a compromise."

Kirk frowned. "Sure. Whatever."

"If it really matters that much to you, we can be...co-captains," Spock offered. "It has never been done before in the history of the Federation, but there is nothing in the rules that explicitly states it cannot be done."