Star Trek One-Shots!!

5. Chekov Does Laundry [Chulu, McKirk]

Alternate title: Chekov, Laundrywoman of the USS Enterprise

This one is really weird. Like, REALLY weird. I honestly have no idea where it came from. I guess I was doing laundry one day and wondered how they did laundry on the Enterprise. And yeah, they probably have machines that automatically do it for them, but for now, pretend that they just have a little communal laundry-room or something. :P

(P.S. Not really any hugely emphasized pairings. If you squint you'll find McKirk and...what is it, Chulu? Chekov x Sulu. Yeah. That. I'm considering broadening my horizons and writing more pairings and one-shots than just Spork and McSpork. :3)

(P.P.S. Imma try my hand at writing his accent, and if it fails, pretend I did that on purpose. :P bc it IS a crack-fic after all.)

*

"All right, you're off for the rest of the day, Chekov," Captain Kirk dismissed the eager young Russian. "Enjoy it."

"Aye-aye, keptin!" Chekov grinned happily as he walked off of the bridge. He had his perfect day off planned out perfectly, and he couldn't wait to get started.

But first, the dreaded task...

...laundry.

Chekov didn't really hate doing laundry, but he didn't love it, either. It was just a thing he had to do. And a thing he had to do now, considering he had already worn most of his shirts twice....

Chekov arrived at his room. He walked in and went over to his closet, grabbing his laundry hamper and leaving the room with it in hand, which was no easy feat, considering it was huuuge.

Chekov made his way down to the floor where the laundry room was. He walked over to an open washer (granted, they were all open—no one else wanted to be caught dead washing their undies in broad daylight). He carefully measured out the perfect amount of soap and poured it in, starting the water.

(Now, how did the Enterprise manage to store enough water to wash over four hundred crew members' laundry? And why were their washers and dryers still only twenty-first century technology, despite it being well into the twenty-third century? Shh. Don't question it.)

Chekov hummed tunelessly as he cheerfully dumped his clothes into the washer. It was a good day to do laundry. Honestly, any day was a good day to do laundry, so long as the ship wasn't under attack or Kirk, Bones, and Spock weren't trying to borrow the laundry room to have a quickie in between shifts.

Chekov shuddered as he remembered the two horrible incidents that had occurred the previous two times he had attempted to do laundry.

The first had involved a certain captain and his two lovers, and resulted in Chekov backing out of the laundry room slowly, laundry forgotten, as he promptly went to go wash his eyes out with bleach (kids, do not try this at home unless you are an incredibly amazingly cute Russian boy named Pavel Andreievich Chekov and even then you probably shouldn't do it).