Shadow ; Joshler

Øne

;☁️;☀️;☁️;

"Tyler you really have to eat more." My mom stated while putting a stack of porcelain plates into a cupboard. I shrugged.

"Not hungry." I stated casually. I'm not sure why I haven't been eating much lately, but the thought of food is starting to make me sick. I'm not anorexic or anything, just not hungry.

"You haven't eaten in four days, sweetie." My mom replied with worry in her voice.

"Mom, I'm fine. I have enough fat to last me anyway." I said while motioning down to my rather chunky thighs.

"Nonsense, Tyler. You are not fat, you're actually very skinny for your age. At least eat something small," My mom said whiling handing me a package of mandarin oranges. Those were my favorite. I couldn't resist it and swiftly took off the plastic seal on the top. My mom physically relaxed at the fact that I had decided to eat.

"So how's school going, honey?" She said while cutting up a cucumber.

"Grade-wise or social-wise? My grades are pretty good and I still have never made a friend once in my life. You know, the same old." I said with a mouth full of oranges. My mom sighed.

"Tyler you really need to make some friends. You're only a teenager once." She said with tiredness while transporting the cucumbers from the island to a pot on the stove.

"Nobody wants to be friends with me, Mom. If somebody wanted to be friends with me they already would have." Tyler said while eating the last orange in the container.

"I'm sure someone would want to be friends with you. You like a lot of bands and can play a lot of instruments, I'm sure there's someone else at your school who does those things too." She said while stirring the pot a little.

"Not really, mom. Everyone at my school is more interested in sports and half naked girls. I'd rather not be associated with those things." I said while tapping a beat on the now empty container.

"Those are just normal things teenagers like. Why don't you play basketball or football or something?" She said desperately, she really wants me to make friends I guess.

"Like I could play a sport. Mom I can't even talk to anybody without stuttering or sounding stupid in general, how would I play a sport?" I said while getting up and tossing the container in the trash. Sometimes I think that's where I belong. The trash.

"Just a thought. But you really need to try, Tyler. It's not healthy to have no social life." She said. I rolled my eyes.

"I'll try, Mom." I said while walking towards the exit of the kitchen. Of course I wouldn't try. I said that only so she wouldn't be worried. I'm incapable of making friends. Believe me, I've tried and failed multiple times.

"Don't try, sweetie. Do." She said while I walked out of the kitchen. I stopped down the hallway and looked at myself in the mirror. My torso was starting to get a little more skinny. Not sure if I should consider that a good or bad thing. I shrugged and opened the door to my room and pulled out a Blur cd and put it in my cd player.

I hummed as Parklife came on and sat on my bed. I pulled out my journal and started jotting down various feelings I had at the moment so I wouldn't blow up with emotion at some point.

I jumped as I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and saw nobody but my own shadow. I calmed myself down and went back to writing when I felt another tap.

I spun around and looked around annoyed, it probably was just in my head. I put my journal down and decided to take a shower. I smelt pretty bad thanks to gym class. Mr. Urie clearly hates me and makes me run extra laps and do more push-ups than everyone else.