Lady and the Tramp

16. Perspectives in Life

Perspectives in Life

Alex's POV

I thought she had abandoned me but that was not true and I actually couldn't decide which one was better

Her abandoning me or her forgetting me...

I mean even when i thought she had abandoned me she was still nice ans approaching to me, i should have figured out something was wrong with her, I have a pretty high IQ, but when it comes to her, I guess I just loose my mind

It was like yesterday, I could still remember when the time came that we would meet again and she didn't come and of course all the rest that happened

I was so happy, Kara had just come to live with us about 2 months ago and i was excited to share it with Maggie and just simply see her, hold her hand, kiss her if she still wanted of course, but she didn't show up, her team was there but she wasn't

It hurt a lot and it wasn't easy to forget but having Kara to take care of helped, she is always such a delight and happy person, you can't hold a grudge with her, Lena's presence helped too she was like a little sister to me

But everything changed a year later, when everything in my world came crashing down and it wasn't easy for me, i couldn't have her close to me after everything

So I created an alter ego, the facade that i had transformed into, who didn't care about anyone and everyone and just did what it wanted without thinking about the consequencies of its actions

Pain can change you...

It definetely did change me for a while, if it wasn't for J'onn, i would have been lost, he brought me out of my self-destruct and even though I still keep up with the facade, I am a better person than I was 2 years ago

"You are thinking of having her too aren't you?"

"You know me too well Alex, so what do you think?You are my right hand after all"

"She could be pretty good if she tried and she is stubborn and smart, she even wants to become a detective which is good and all but her injury might become a problem, she could get hurt, why her J'onn?"

"She is a good swimmer, fast, smart and level-headed, she can adapt pretty quickly and last of all the incident in the cafeteria, she seeks the truth and will bring justice if she sees something wrong, she is the perfect candidate, like you"

"I am not perfect and you know it, but yes she could be, well it's your decision not mine so let me know what you decide"

I turned my back to him and walked towards the door but he stopped me

"Alex...she really doesn't remember anything, don't hold a grudge...I have read her mind and sh-"

"J'onn stop I know I was right here when she told us about the accident and the amnesia, it's really intruding sliping into someone else's mind you know and I have told you to not do it to me again"

"You know that I haven't done it again after the first time Alex, you know i respect your privacy, i just know that she is a sore subject. Just know that there is more behind her, much more"

"I know, i'm sorry, a lot has happened lately and i am trying to cope with everything, I have to go change"

He gave me a nod and i left quickly towards the locker room to change

So many thoughts still in my mind, she didn't remember me, she was in a car accident...she was right there changing with her back at me

Fuck...

It was like the first time I saw her, not first but you know what I mean, her getting changed i guess

Her body had grown from the last time I had seen her like this, I mean yeah we had changed here together again but i tried not to ogle her

But damn she was more, more of everything, i mean 4 years had passed what would she be less

She had alredy changed into her swimwear that clinged so beautifully in all the right places, I mean her a-

Shut your mind, Alex

i decided stupidly to make myself known to her so i coughed and stepped a little more loudly

She turned towards me and was a little shocked to see someone here i guess and she covered herself with a towel

I gave her a nod and turned towards my locker to get changed trying to be quick to avoid the tension and the awkward silence in the room

"Don't tell anyone about my accident, please"

"I won't...i promise, besides it's non of my business" yeah right

"Thank you, I hope you won't treat me differently after what you heard, i am not helpless or anything, I have just forgotten some of my past and my arm hurts a little, It's not that big of a deal"

To me it was, a very big deal

"Like i said i won't"

I closed my locker and stepped outside, I was in a whirlwind of emotions I needed to get out, let out some steam

I went towards the pool, stepped in the podium and without stopping i threw my self in the water

I was swimming without thinking, focusing on my task, nothing more

Before i knew it I was on the other side and started again

I didn't count how many laps i had done but it must have been a lot because i hadn't realised that my classmates had arrived, as well as J'onn who whistled pretty loud to gain my attention

I stopped and was panting, everyones eyes on me, some in awe, maybe they were watching me swimming from the start, others in lust, yeah i knew i had a pretty toned body

The eyes though that i wanted to see were watching me with a look i couldn't decipher

Kara was standing next to her with Lena by her side, both with a look of sadness I couldn't handle looking at

I stepped out of the pool and went towards the towel i had thrown before, which was right next to her she must have seen me going her way because she looked down and saw and picked it up

I had come close to her by that time and she just held it towards me, looking me in the eyes, those beautiful eyes

I almost lost my breath when she gave me a dimple filled smile with that innocent look on her face

it was hard not to blush, but i think I succeeded

I grabbed the towel to me, drying my body and avoiding her gaze

"Thank you"

"It was nothing"

I went towards J'onn and asked if i could go since i did my laps, but he knew I just wanted to think, he said yes and I left

I went to change and then left immediately trying not to draw any attention towards me

I headed towards the archery court but remembered that there must a class held right now so to my room it was I guess, at least I would be alone Vasquez was in the pool house

I arrived at my room and quickly threw myself on my bed, truly emotionaly exhausted, i just wanted to rest

I turned on my side and sitting on my nightstand was a vase with a single flower in it...

A red rose...

A flower that held so much significance in it's view to me at least, a memory of a happy time, when everything was ok, when i had her in my arms

at that moment I did something I hadn't done in a long time

I cried...everything came out, every frustration, pain, sadness, everything

And like that i fell asleep...knowing that tomorrow all my tears will be gone and the facade would be back again...