Collection of One Shot's

Becoming a James

It's a little different this story so bear with it and I hope you enjoy :-)

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Like every relationship we had to work extremely hard at ours. Like all couples we inevitably had to face the 'six year hitch' and what a horrible eighteen months that was, I honestly didn't think we would make it through the other side. Months of depression, days of not even talking to each other and hours of not looking into each other's eyes, yeah it was hard.

Friends around us were coming to the same period of their own relationships and they were sinking quicker than the Titanic so I was understandably petrified. I loved my partner Micah with all of my heart but I guess it was my fault we were suffering through this 'hitch' and I know it's no excuse but he was my first. Even after all of this time the fact that I was gay is still a surprise to me and it was for this reason that I was creating tension.

Before I go into details I want to let you know something to at least make you think about all of the facts before jumping down my neck. I never fought my feelings and I never once denied them, I put my all into making my relationship with Micah work and I think the first six years have proved that right?

So where were we yeah the 'hitch' well it had come about because I was questioning whether I had made the right decision or not? I rushed into the relationship I had never even looked at a man before, then I met Micah and his smile- god that smile! The next thing I know I am drunk, squeezing his arse and telling other people off for coming on to him. I am such an embarrassing person.

I told my family after just two weeks, what I was thinking I will never know. It may never have worked out but I hate lying to people especially myself and I was convinced this wouldn't be a fling so why wait? Now however I can't help but think about what I had always had drummed into me, what about the perfect wife and kids. I always wanted a family but would I be able to have that with Micah? I wasn't so sure.

So I became a petty, childish boyfriend and made him suffer too while I decided if he was good enough for me or not. Harsh? Yeah I know. Even my siblings who never even liked Micah were on his side, my sister Hannah even threatened me with my life saying that I didn't deserve him and never would and what can I say it was probably true.

There is a happy ending to this backstory though and I guess that's where the story really begins. We made it through when most couples around us were failing, splitting up or divorcing one another. When I came though it I looked at Micah with new eyes, he quickly became my everything all over again and I was so happy that he had the patience of a saint. He could have left me at any time during that period I think a few times I actually told him to leave but he didn't, he stood by me.

I decided right there that I may not be able to have the ordinary family with kids but I could make my own extraordinary one with Micah. So what if we were both men we had the right to have the same happy ending as everyone else and I guess it had just taken me a while to realise this. So as they say when one door closes another opens and we decided to make our own version of happy ever after.

Unfortunately this is once again a time where you probably want to hit me across the head but there was no romantic gesture from me when it came to proposing. I didn't get a ring or get down on one knee, I didn't plaster his face on the big screen at a football match and I certainly didn't embarrass myself in a restaurant in front of a million people. It just came to me, we hadn't even discussed it to be honest most of this conflict had been going on inside my head for the last eighteen months. Even when we had come through it I didn't relay everything to him.

We went out for tea one night and we were talking about our future, happy that we had survived and deciding where we wanted to go from there. So like I said no romantic gestures, I simply just told him that we should get married and have kids and his face lit up and he agreed. I don't think Micah ever expected it to be all clichéd so just putting the question out there at all was a surprise to him. I also don't believe for one moment he was waiting for me to ask it was just a spur of the moment thing.