Missed Connections

Missed Connections Chapter 31

Chapter 31

Over an hour later, Jack pulls up and exits his car, and as happy as I am to see his friendly, familiar, non-hippie face, I realize again with stark clarity that I wish it were Blake, because he's the one I really want to talk to right now. Blake's emotional support has edged out the molten chemistry between Jack and me, but that doesn't make me feel any better.

Still, I can't help smiling at him, sadness swelling because I still love him too and good-bye isn't going to be easy to say. "Thank you."

He takes my bag. "What's going on?"

"I'll be better as soon as this place is just a speck in the rearview mirror. Total violation of my boundaries. And no sleep. They took my phone, had someone paw through our bags without our permission while we were in the course, taking things so we wouldn't be distracted by the outside world."

"What the hell?"

"So I left the course and stole my phone back." I grin, feeling a bit like a badass.

"What about Fern and Ziggy?"

"What about them?"

"What did they say when you told them you were

leaving?"

I pause and bite my lip. "Oh, I haven't exactly told them."

"Sarah!" He laughs. "You have to tell them you're leaving."

"Maybe I told them etherically..."

"You what?" His forehead wrinkles in confusion.

"It's something they do, where they basically meditate and imagine telling the person."

"Sarah."

I guess sneaking off isn't the best course of action, but I don't want to deal with them anymore today. "I'm scared I might say something I'll regret. Or wave my new job offer in their faces while flipping the bird."

He tilts his head. "That's fair."

"Sarah, what's going on?"

I get a crick in my neck as I whip my head toward the entrance of the hotel. Shit. Maybe I shouldn't have joked about that etheric crap. "Hi, Ziggy."

"You can't just leave the program. We've given you plenty of time to cool off from your little performance in group, but it's time to come back now." He squints suspiciously at Jack.

"Ziggy, I'm sorry, but it's just not for me. I gave it a fair try, but it's not something that I'm comfortable continuing." That's about as diplomatic as I can be under the circumstances.

Ignoring Jack, Ziggy stops in front of me and crosses his arms. "There are three days left. A lot can happen in those days that I think you'll want to stick around for. You've been doing well so far. Don't let the phone get in the way of your enlightenment."

He's trying to entice me back, but I don't give a tiny crack of a rat's ass about the rest of the course.

What I've seen already has been more than enough.

His eyes don't have bags or dark smudges under them like mine do, and that makes me wonder something.

"Ziggy, do you and Fern sleep in a room with a bed?"

"Well, yes, but—"

"That's what I thought. Sorry, but I can't stay and drown in the hypocrisy anymore." They lie around comfortable and well-fed while we starve on the path to spiritual growth? No thanks.