Dysfunctional

Satisfying my hunger

I waited for 6:30 anxiously for some odd reason. I wasn't really in an emergency or something. But all of a sudden I really had to get some things off my chest.

I don't know if that's ever happened to you before. You're fine one minute but then a lot of ideas or thoughts hit you all at once and you start worrying about what, a minute ago, seemed like the farthest thing from your mind.

All of a sudden I was being overwhelmed by a lot of things that I wasn't even thinking about a minute ago. It was really weird. I think I have a tendency to be introspective...I doubt that though.

So now I had a lot of things to get off my mind, hence me calling Nick. I also had to get something in my stomach, hence me getting back in the house and rummaging through the fridge for something to eat.

I buried my head in the open fridge and felt the cool air hit my face. Yeah, that felt nice.

"What are you doing?" I heard a voice behind me.

I took my head out of the fridge and turned around to see who was behind me. It was Theo looking amused.

"I'm looking for food, I'm starving. Why are you smiling?" I asked.

"Oh nothing. Just remembering something." He leaned against the kitchen counter and folded his arms across his chest. "Do you remember when the weather would get really hot and the two of us would leave the fridge wide open and stick our heads inside just to get cooler?"

"Yeah." I said laughing a little. "Mom hated that and Dad knew she did so he'd tell us to get our heads out of there and when we did, he'd put his head in there just to tick Mom off." The memory created a warm feeling in me but then it died when a thought came to mind.

"Things were better back then, weren't they? Less tense and weird, right?" I asked.

The smile waned a little off of Theo's face. "Yeah..it was." The kitchen was filled with an odd silence, and I could tell Theo was trying hard not to think about how things were before Dad's death. I was trying not to think about it too.

"I got a bag of chips up in my room if uh you know, you're still hungry." He said, trying to change the subject.

I took the bait gratefully. "Gimme. I'm dying here."

"Let's go then." Theo led the way to his room (well the room he shared with the two youngest) and I followed behind.

He opened the door to his room and we got in. Thankfully the twins weren't in the room.

"Hey, where are the twins?" I asked sitting on the bottom half of the bunk bed that Tommy and Timmy slept in.

"They're in Toby's room." He said, tossing the bag of chips to me before sitting on his bed.

I opened it and took a chip, popping it into my mouth. "I don't like them hanging out with him. He might turn them against us or something." Does that sound ridiculous?

"I understand but they're his brothers too. We have to let be with him or it looks weird." He said.

I nodded and concentrated on eatingy bag of chips. I should probably eat some real food but I just want to satisfy my present cravings.

After the silence between us wore on, I decided to speak. "Nick is coming over today. Around 6:30. I'm gonna talk to him about somethings that I've been worried about since just before summer started." Because I just realised that the reason these thoughts had never hit me so suddenly like this before is because I've never given them much thought, they've been there way before summer started but back then, I just bury them but now that I thought them over, it's something that's a little overwhelming and needs to be shared.