Novella

Friends

Written by: Qi Ying

What's wrong with myself?  Why do I even exist? Everyone hates me. Everything I do causes problems for everyone. I was clumsy, self-centered, sensitive and unattractive. I couldn't lie to myself but people in my school only judged people by their appearance. If you were unattractive, you would find yourself eating alone during lunch. Although I was unattractive, I used makeup to cover up all my imperfection. At night, when I wiped off my makeup, I looked horrible. Makeup was my best friend.

It was the first day of school after the Summer Break. As I walked to the train station early in the morning  to go to school, I started to think that school today would not be good. What happens if no one wanted to talk to me? What if they found me annoying if I tried to talk to them? Before the June Holidays started, I didn't end the first school semester well. I bet all my friends disliked me. I drifted apart from all of them. All of them. I did not have any friends to hang out with me or joke with me. It felt really different from the previous Summer.

I started to regret whatever I said to them. If I wasn't inconsiderate, I wouldn't have hurt their feelings.

"This group was not even important to me anyway!"

Why was I so ignorant! They must have thought that I was a moron and I know that they would never forgive me. During recess, they would stare at me and dis about me. It was obvious as they were frowning. It was funny how we started as close friends but ended up becoming a group of people who ignored each other. The worst feeling is when I pretend I don't care about something, when really, it's all I thought about.

It all started when I heard my 'friends' laughing at how dumb I was, and it made me really frustrated when I knew that they were just taking me as a joke . "Ugh, remember that time when she slipped and fell on the floor. I wished we did not have to help her up, she was so embarrassing!"

While I was in the train, I was finally sorting out my thoughts.

I felt like during the Summer Break, I distracted myself from thinking about them. It's the holiday, I did not wish to ruin it just because of a friendship problem. I thought how stupid it was to still care about them and I decided to put them aside and stay positive. I still could find new friends from my school! It was alright to lose them because they hurt me. They hurt me and I actually thought they were my real friends. Maybe they were not.

"We don't lose friends, we just learn who the real ones are."

A/N : I'm sorry if there is any grammatic error!