Good afternoon. Good afternoon. Good afternoon. It sounds weird when you say it fast, but then say it slowly. It makes you think how did some one create such a casual greeting, but then with lacking effort for research you quickly forget about it and continue on your day. I returned back into the hospital to be in a more "safe environment", but I felt bad for leaving Mrs. Harvey all alone once more. Lucci whined everyday I left the house, and only to jump up and down with her plump belly jiggling around. I'm in a plain white room, and the nurse recently made the bed with the white sheets. The machines are somewhat quiet, and the white room I'm in was so peaceful. After the nurse left I had her open the window for fresh air, and I guess I gave her the puppy eyes and lifted the bars and opened the window. I never noticed the small wind chime on the bars, making soft jiggles in the wind with feathers blowing through. It made peaceful music, and barely moved an inch. I drew a picture, but that is on a separate sheet. Right now I decided to write my progress.
How I feel? Utterly terrible. God... Everyday is so irritating and so mind splitting, and it's almost like some invisible monster is scratching my head and broke my sanity. It made me the mess I am. I know it sounds weird, but imagine being tied down your own bed. You haven't eaten at all today, and her eyes are so heavy you close them to feel nothing. Suddenly you're heart feels like it's being stabbed and your chocking on the lump in your throat; you begin crying and trembling but you can't move because everything in your body is so stiff and weak. You finally feel the pain numb, along with the rest of your feelings for a short while, as then you sit up. That was just a single minute. Every minute that happens no matter where, and no matter how.
I'm shaking. Everything feels terrible, but then suddenly everything feels boring. It makes you question what your life had become, and makes you lie in bed having to be taken care of by nurses. I learned how to play piano. I've been taking medication. I wish I returned to my apartment, and just stay there for the rest of the month. A new nurse walked in, and now I must take my leave.
Maybe I should get a dog?
Signing off,
Bonnie Gray
YOU ARE READING
August's Tears
General FictionRead through the tearjerking, depressing, and dark journal of Bonnie Gray Bonnie Gray is a young adult female who is now learning how to deal with her paranoia and depression by the help of her 74 year-old landlord Mrs. Fiona Harvey Read how these t...
