The Joker x Male Reader Oneshots

Laundry Day

Laundry day
See you there
Under things
Tumbling
Wanna say
Love your hair
Here I go
Mumbling
With my freeze ray I will stop the world

You live in what people would call the bad part of town. There's this small laundry mat that doesn't get much business. But there's always this one guy who comes in.

You know exactly who he is, you'd be a shitty criminal if you didn't know him. His long-ish brown-green hair, and of course his beautiful scars.

You've become completely infatuated with him. Of course, you always admired him as a criminal, but seeing him in person, you don't quite know, you don't really wanna say you fell for him mostly because you haven't even said one word to him, but....

It became a habit for you to come in whenever he's there, you learned his laundry schedule. He comes in every Wednesday at five pm.

You like to watch him. You wish you could work up the courage to talk to him, but every time you've tried you get scared and anxious and just mumble to the point where he couldn't hear you at all.

With my freeze ray I will
find the time to find the words to
Tell you how
How you make
Make me feel
What’s the phrase?
Like a fool
Kinda sick
Special needs
Anyways
With my freeze ray I will stop the pain

You've been working on a freeze ray, cliché, you know, but you love the idea of being able to freeze things. It'd be so much easier to rob places if you could just freeze everyone, not to mention that you could freeze warm drinks, so it does have everyday uses too.

It's almost perfect, just a few more adjustments need to be made. You need only one more part, which shouldn't be that hard to get, you just have to break into this science lab up town. After that you can stop anyone who opposes your beloved.

Then you can show him, he'll see, you'll be worthy of him. You want him to see you as a criminal mastermind worth him associating with, worth loving. You want to give him everything you have, you want to create chaos for and with him.

It’s not a death ray or an ice beam
That’s all Johnny Snow
I just think you need time to know
That I’m the guy to make it real
The feelings you don’t dare to feel
I’ll bend the world to our will
And we’ll make time stand still

After months of watching him, you think you're finally ready to talk to him. You're so nervous but you want him to notice you, you want to be something to him, something worth fighting for.

You can't deny it anymore, you fell for him, you know it's insane since you've never spoken to him but you just know that you'll be the perfect couple that will take over the world. You'll both get everything you've ever wanted.

You bring your laundry to the machine next to the one he's using. You put your laundry in the washer working up the courage to say something. You try to will him to say something with your mind but, of course, it doesn't work.

You wish he'd say something first... You feel kinda stupid, scratch that, really stupid. You just want to rule the world by his side, to be his and only his.

That’s the plan
Rule the world
You and me
Any day

"Love your hair"

You accidentally blurt aloud to him. You mentally reprimand yourself for saying something, let alone something so stupid.

"What?" He looks over at you. Your eyes widen, you panic stuttering out something probably even more stupid.

"No – I… love the… air…"

You facepalm mentally sighing. Maybe next time. Eventually you will be able to talk to him. Someday.

Anyway
With my freeze ray I will stop