Touring with 5sos //sequel to adopted by 5sos

Part 3

"So this is the London eye" says my beautiful boyfriend pointing at the giant Ferris wheel behind him
"Really, I thought it was Hyde park" I remark sarcastically
He rolls his eyes before going back to smiling "Do you want to go on it?" He asks
I take a look at my phone and see it's nearly ten. "I would but Ashton said to be back by ten" I sigh
"Ahh curfew"
"What?" I say letting slightly more of my accent out than intended which Shawn finds amusing
"Like curfew, when you need to be home"
"Oh yeah" I say
"Let's get you home" Shawn smiles
"Can I just stay with you?, right now home for me is a hotel room full of boys who are angry at me" I beg
"I would love that but we can't" he says and I groan "Come on Hannah princess we need to get you home"
And with that we jump in a taxi and go straight to the hotel. Shawn walks me to my room and smiles "How about tomorrow I come over and we can do a proper date before the show, not just a stupid pizza and walk" he says
"I loved the pizza and the walk" I say referring to tonight's date which Shawn isn't very pleased with
" I know but I still want to do it anyway" he says
"Deal" I smile and he kisses me goodbye
"Goodnight Hannah the beautiful princess, sleep well" he says politely and saunters off

I go back into Ashton's hotel room where Ashton is passed out on the couch in the same position as I left him in.
I grab a blanket and place it over him and lie down beside him, not really in the mood to sleep.
The next morning
I'm lying down on the couch pretending to be asleep as I have been doing for the past hour and will be doing for another forty five minutes because I'm not in the mood to eat so I need to stay asleep until breakfast downstairs closes.
Something about being here makes me revert back to old habits, like not sleeping or eating. And then suddenly my head starts to spin and nothing I do feels right. It feels like my limbs aren't attached to my body.
I open my eyes and look around, Ashton is sitting in his phone completely oblivious to my awakeness.
"Ash" I whimper
"Hmm" he mumbles softly and turns around
"I-I-its nothing never mind" I say
"Hannah what's wrong?" He says walking towards me
And then I start having the worst twenty minutes of me life. My limbs shake uncontrollably and I can't breath everything is spinning and I feel like I'm going to die.
"Hannah" Ashton says firmly "Hannah honey, I need you to calm down"
"No, I can't calm down, I'm fat and ugly and worthless and I don't deserve you or Shawn or Michael or Luke or Calum or anything good."
"No Hannah listen to me your amazing. You are everything to me. You are beautiful, smart, funny and amazing. That's why I really need you to start breathing with me. Okay?"
"Okay" I exhale
"Okay, that's it in and out" he says calmly exaggerating his breaths. He takes me in his arms and holds me tight.
"You are so amazing" he whispers into my ear "never forget that"

Hello peeps (remind me never to say that again) dead quick I just wanted to say that my depiction of a panic attack isn't necessarily what everyone feel like. Everyone has slightly different experiences, what I write is mine. That is all xxxxx