Touring with 5sos //sequel to adopted by 5sos

Part 12

Hannah's POV

A few days later

"Baby I'm just going for a shower and then I thought we could go for a walk" Shawn mumbles tiredly getting up from the bed where we've been watching Forrest Gump

"Okay hun" I smile taking in his entire being as he struts out of the room, thinking about what I did to deserve such a wonderful person.

Ashton walks into my room with a worried look on his face "Han"

I sit up knowing that something is wrong "What?"

"Well there's a really shitty article been published about you" he says

I open up my laptop to twitter, it's already a moment.

'Hannah Irwin Exposed as hybristophilic while meeting her lover in prison'

The article is about me supposedly cheating on Shawn with someone in prison because I have hybristophilia (an attraction to violent criminals). I don't know why but this article hurts me for some reason. After all the shit that's been said about me, this one attacked Shawn too, that's not alright with me.

I fake laugh to make Ashton go away, which he does, and then I revert back to the only thing I do when I don't want to feel something. I cut. I walk into my bathroom, which no one else uses and grab one of my secret blades taped to the bottom of my sink and take one cut at my arm.

As I start the second one the blade is ripped from my hand by Shawn who sprints in once he figures out what I'm doing. He looks at me disappointed.

"Baby don't," I say

"Don't what?" he says almost in shock

"look at me like that"

"Hannah," he says "How am I supposed to look at you when I walk in and you're cutting yourself?"

"I-I just need to okay," I say loudly "It helps me calm down"

"It does, does it?" He says, he takes my hand opens my palm and sets the blade in it, cautiously. He then rolls up his sleeve. He looks straight into my eyes and says "However many you were gonna do on this" he lifts my arm "Do on this" he points to his own arm.

Silence. "Go on"

"No" I whisper as my gaze drops but Shawn doesn't let it, he lifts my head back up and forces me to look him straight in the eye

"Why not?" he asks forcefully

"because I can't hurt you" I almost yell

"it hurts me just as bad when you do it to yourself" his eyes pierce through me "this way we can cut out the middleman"

"No," I say "Shawn stop it"

"Hannah I love you. And when you hurt yourself it hurts me, it hurts me to know that I can't help you."

"I'm sorry," I say he pulls me tight in a hug "I'm so sorry"

He quietly shushes me and pulls me in tighter kissing my forehead as he does.

"Oh," he whispers into my hair "There's not a single tabloid or gossip site that could stop me thinking the entire world of my girl. Hannah the beautiful princess"

For a while, we just sit there on the bathroom floor hugging. And the only thing I can think about is how much I'm sure that this is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.

"Shawn," I say

"Yeah," he looks down

"I love you" I whisper "more than you can understand"

UMMMMMM hey guys. It's been a while and oh my god have I missed you all. I kinda stopped writing after a shitty patch of mental health and then I stopped altogether. I'm really sorry.

But I am back and here to stay.

Love yall