Stuck In Love

MY Person

{I got the picture above from IG so credits to whoever made it}

Andrea's P.O.V

Hanging up on him was probably the hardest thing to do. Having the option to either listen to his deep, low and soothing voice or hanging up on him and cutting him off was the hardest decision ive had to make recently. The worst part was that i had to decide right there and then. I had to decide what was better for me. For my heart. For my emotional being.

I saw how my tears fell down and onto my phone's screen. I hated myself. I hated myself for doing this to myself. For still loving him. For still crying when he made his way into my thoughts.

We all have that one true love. That one person we are willing to go through hell and back. That one person that no matter what, we will always be there. That one person that no matter how many times they mess up, we will always forgive them.

But....

There comes a day where enough is enough. There comes a day that you're done trying, you're just done. There comes a day were you're done getting hurt emotionally.

But....

Theres also that day were you wish you could run to him and hug him as tight as possible. Theres also that day were you dont even want to hear their name.

And thats how the love life is... its shitty.

I slowly walk to my room and jump onto my bed. I pulled the blankets over my head and not even a second later tears ran down my cheeks. I was so heart broken. My heart felt weak.

All i wanted right now was my person. The person who i went to for everything. The person i couldnt live without. The person i couldnt stay mad at. The person that supported me through everything. Sadly this person took me to hell and back. This person was....Kian. MY Kian.

I was slowly falling asleep when my phone buzzed. This time i was scared to even see who or what it was. I didnt want his name to pop up, even though i needed him i didnt want to think about him anymore.

I hesitate to unlock my phone and see.
Once i see a K i knew it was him. Kian. The only person i didnt want to know anything about at the moment.

I didnt want to open it. I didnt care what he wanted. I didnt want to know anything about him.

But i knew i had too. My anxiety would never let me sleep without me opening it. So i do so.

Kian
-im sorry. Sorry for everything. EVERYTHING. And i meant it. I wish things were different. I wish i would have never ended things bc honestly i cant live without u. I wish u were still mine. I wish i could run to u right now to kiss u, hug u and tell u all about my tour. I love you and i need u to know that Andrea. You're my person, you will always be my person. But, i wont bother u again. Actually i wont hurt u again. I love you💔 i never meant to hurt u. Never meant harm. How could i want to hurt the only girl i love. But im done now. Goodbye my love💔

Once again i was in pain. Emotionally in pain. My heart couldnt take this. Why? Why did he have to do this? Why?

~~

Trying to open my eyes the next morning was impossible. It was like if all my tears had glued them shut. I get up and walk towards the restroom and i see my reflection. A reflection that was horrid. I looked dead. Physically and emotionally dead.

My eyes were red and puffy, swollen from all the crying. I wash my face quickly before jumping in the shower.

Once i was done i put on an over size shirt and jumped onto my bed again. I had no energy whats so ever to do anything. I could almost say i had no energy to even live.

My phone buzzed and i was afraid to check who had messaged me. I flip my phone and see Jc's name pop up on my lock screen. Oh god.

I open it to see a some what long paragraph.

From: jaysee
-yo, just wanted to see if u were alright. K told me everything. Im sorry u have to go through this Russett. K isnt himself and that tells me alot, but i know i dont have anything to do with this i just dont want to see both of yall hurting. I love both of yall. Im here if u need me Russett

Once again my tears fell down my cheek like a waterfall. Jc was so....Jc. He's the friend everybody needs when going through a rough time and K was so lucky that was his bff.

I reply to his message saying , 'thanks Jc, for everything. I know i can count on u whenever, but K is ur bff and i dont want to talk about him, not that u will tell him anything...'

Seconds later my phone buzzed again.

From: jaysee
-Andrea u know u can count on me. Everything and anything u tell me stays between us. I consider myself both of yalls friend and i would never betray any of yall. But i understand. If u need me im here... take care Russett.

At this point i didnt know what to do. I was clueless. I was lost. I needed my bff...

I facetimed Sandra and before she could even pick up i was already crying.

She picked up on the second ring and began to say, "heyyyyy bit...babe whats wrong?"

"Sandra, i need you....", i sobbed.

"What happened?"

"Kian...Kian happened!"

"Baby, i told you that you need to move on. He cant keep hurting you like that. If you wont stop him, then i will. Just look at you. You're hurting because of that asshole and where is he? On a f**king tour!!", she shouts through the phone.

"I...i know....but i f**ken love that kid, Sandra. I really do....", i cry.

"I know you do....just by hearing how hurt you are i can tell. So what did he do now?"

"Nothing. He wants to get back together but i dont want to get hurt. He's in tour. What makes me think he's not going to be a f**kboy during tour and then come back and be lovey dovey with me...", i state wiping the tears off my face.

"Then dont get back with him. Simple. Wait till he comes back and yall can talk about it", she tells me.

"He texted me today. He told mr he wont bother me anymore. That he's done."

"Then yall are done? Andrea, im getting a plane ticket and im going to LA, so be ready", she said before hanging up.

Oh i freaking loved this girl. She was literally the ideal best friend.