that night, i couldnt sleep. couldnt sleep without the presence of troye next to me. this is what it would feel like if he wasnt alive. i would sleep alone each night without his there for the rest of my life.
i even convinced myself he was dead at one point, just so i could prepare myself and not be as shocked if i get the news that he is actually dead.
i decided to go outside on this sleepless night, look at the stars go near the water. if troye is dead i would probably kill myself, honestly. i dont know how i would love without him.
i picture him now, his cute face, those lips that i just want to kiss so badly sometimes. his soft hair that i yearn to touch so badly right now, his freckles that are like stars, and his birthmark on his cheek under the blue eyes that i'm pretty sure i'm in love with. i want to hold him so tight. he's going to be the death of me.
i pray under the stars that night, kneeling near the shore to god that troye is alive, that he'll stay.
please troye,
stay.
