troye and i were getting ready to go to sleep when i remembered what my mom and i were talking about earlier.
i was getting changed while troye was on my phone. "troye?"
"hmm?" he hummed
"what do you think about us being brothers?"
"um honestly? i think that would be really weird"
"i agree... i'm just wondering because we are trying to figure out stuff.... do you think you would want to be adopted or?"
"i mean.... yeah i love you guys as a family but it doesnt feel like you're my family like you know what i mean? i feel the we are best friends"
"yeah i feel the same way"
there was an awkward silence for some moments.
"well the other option would be that you go into the foster care system for maybe a week to a month and then we can foster care you... but that takes time" i said
"oh... i dont know" he said in a worried tone.
"i dont want you to feel like theres pressure on anything its just a suggestion and there is more options that my parents are still looking into, okay?"
"yeah" he nodded, but i could tell he wouldnt stop thinking about it.
later in the night i woke up and saw him thinking again... and crying.
"baby whats wrong?" i said and then fucking realized i said 'baby'.
he snapped his head over to look at me and smiled. i think it was because I accidentally said baby.
"i'm scared jay" he said curling into me
"about what?"
"i'm scared to go into the foster care system and be away from everything and you and i wont know anyone and it will be scary and for a whole month too"
"well you can do what you want about this whole thing and i can come visit you maybe? it depends on what i can or can not do"
"can i-i have a hug?" he asked hesitantly. troye always seemed more soft and small during the night time and early mornings it was cute.
"aw troye i dont want you to be scared about this," i said while pulling him to a hug "just remember though the outcome will be good and thats what matters... even just being there a couple weeks is for paper work reasons"
"yeah you're right"
i wanted to stay like this, hugging. he was so soft he made me soft.
