A Marshmallow's Guide to Loving a Complete Idiot (Inanimate Insanity)(Marshple)

17. Keep Gifts Simple

Walmart was a vibrant place when the weather got chilly. Holiday sales brought people there with Christmas lists in hand, and holiday displays provided something new to look at; fir trees covered in ornaments atop shelves and Santa-emblazoned banners were only the tip of the iceberg there.

If Walmart had everything, why wouldn't it have Christmas cheer?

"Marsh! Can't you see all the Christmas joy?! It's a dream come truuue!"

Apple was covered in gold tinsel as she dashed over to Marsh, a red Christmas ornament hanging from her stem. She was grinning like, well, a child on Christmas morning. Behind her, Marsh noticed a Christmas tree display that looked suspiciously bare.

Marsh sighed. "Apple, the employees work really hard to set this place up for the holidays. Put that stuff back! You'll-" There was a loud crunch as Apple fell on her face. "...Trip," Marsh finished lamely.

As Marsh tugged her to her feet, Apple babbled on. "But no wait seriously Marsh, this is the best season of them all. All the red and green everywhere, and the smell of the trees! The decorations, the snow, the glorious smell of all the trees... It's amazing! Hey, why're you taking off my Christmas uniform?"

"If I don't, you'll just fall on your face again. ...Geez, I know you're excited, but I'd rather you didn't act like a total child. You'll get my Walmart membership revoked if you keep this up."

"Pfft. Yeah yeah, Mom."

"D-don't call me that!"

Both of them were taken aback by how adamantly she said it. As the tinsel dropped to the ground, Apple said, "Sorry, Marsh. Didn't think it'd bug you that much."

Even though she knew that Apple was 100% joking, hearing her refer to her as such, even sarcastically, felt all kinds of wrong... 'It must be a pet peeve of mine or something,' she decided. "Just stick by me and try not to touch anything. People are staring."

Apple didn't stop pointing out everything and babbling about how wonderful Christmas was, but at least she had the tact not to dismantle any more displays. (And, at least most the shopping they had to do was in the mundane aisles, whereas the influx of Christmas shoppers were gathered mostly in the toy and gift aisles. Not as many people were staring and pulling their phones out as usual, if anything.)

'We could really use a new heating pad; it gets so cold in that mansion...' She glanced at the price tags on the aisle they were on and recoiled. 'Sheesh! Do they even have one battery-operated?'

Before she could check, she was interrupted by a sharp gasp. Marsh looked up to see Apple pointing at something at the end of the aisle. Marsh followed her trembling finger to see a huge red sled, with plastic Christmas everything around it: trees, lights, snowmen.

Sitting in the sled was a disgruntled-looking trophy dressed as Santa Claus. Standing near him were a pair of elves connected by a stem who were vaguely familiar. Marsh squinted at them, trying to figure out where she'd seen them before...

"...So Walmart does fake Santas too, now?"

"But he's not fake! Look at him."

"...He's shining."

"Of course he is! He shines with the joy of the season."

"Apple, Santa's not- err, I-I mean, you want to see him?"

"What a silly question to ask. Of course I'm gonna go see Santa Claus. How else will he know what to leave under the tree?"

Figuring it'd at least free Marsh to finish the shopping more quickly, she shrugged. "Fine, go for it. Try not to make a commotion or destroy any more sets. ...If you get kidnapped, just scream as loud as possible, okay?"