Presque Vu

Chapter 11

When Raina had finished, Jared took the empty water bottle and set it on the nightstand. He then placed his finger under her chin and drew her up so that she was facing him.

"Okay, now that you've had a chance to settle down, I'm going to ask again. Are you okay?" he said, blue eyes peering at her intensely.

She nodded. "I'm good." She leaned forward and pressed her lips lightly to his. "And I really am sorry I was such a brat."

"Well we've already dealt with that portion of things, so let's let it go." He kissed her back, running his thumb along her cheekbone. "How do you feel about continuing this though?"

Raina wasn't sure what he meant by that so she sought clarification. "Do you mean right now or in general?"

"In general. Is this somewhere you're comfortable with this going?"

"I don't have a lot of experience with it. Any really," she pointed out. "I think I am. I thought it was what I wanted."

"Thought?" Jared asked, "Past tense? Was it something I did?"

"No. It's not..." Raina was having so much trouble sorting the turmoil in her own head she didn't know how she was going to explain this to Jared. "I've always wanted..." she trailed off again, trying to sort her thoughts enough to explain. "My ex, he was very...traditional... in the bedroom. I always fantasized about so much more. And then that first night, you seemed to read just what I wanted, and I was so excited to have found someone who was interested in that. I still think I am but I'm realizing I don't really know what I'm doing. And it's not just that. A lot of things are falling together in different ways than I expected them to these days. Not just you."

Jared grumbled. "Does this have anything to do with that date you were on last night? Do you have a boyfriend Raina? Am I just some little fling that got out of hand?"

"No," she answered quickly. "That's just someone else I had recently started seeing. I don't know what I want from him yet. Or you either."

She hadn't meant to be so honest. This whole evening was just a little out of control and leaning off the rails, but that seemed to be the new normal since meeting Jared and Shannon. And it's hard to get a train back on track when you don't even know where the rails are. Why the hell did Cassie have to give Shannon her number? She'd have been perfectly happy with whatever was developing between her and Jared but now she was stepping deeper and deeper into a complicated mess no matter what steps she took.

"Well there's an easy way to settle your confusion," Jared observed. "At least part of it. Break it off with him."

"What? No. I don't want to break it off with him. If I did, I wouldn't be confused right now."

"Then you are attached to him." Jared sounded upset. She had hoped that he would be as casual about things as Shannon was, but clearly, that wasn't going to be the case here. "Otherwise, why would you mind breaking it off with him?"

"What are you asking me exactly?" Of course she didn't want to stop seeing Shannon. And even though he seemed put out by the whole idea of her date last night, she strongly suspected Jared wasn't ready to give anything up either. "Are you telling me you don't want me seeing anyone else? Are you ready to make that same promise?"

"Do you want me to?" he challenged.

"Did I ask you to?" Raina could feel her voice rising as once again Jared seemed to be getting her on the defensive. "You're the one who brought this subject up, Jared, not me." His frown was turning into a pout and Raina realized how unaccustomed he probably was to not getting his way. "Wow, women really do just give you anything you want, don't they?"