A Ghost From the Past

An Old Story

(I don't own anything except the picture editing and the storyline)
So here's the next chapter. I know that the "The Living and The Dead" fan base isn't so big, but I'm glad that someone is reading this:)

-----------------ooOoWoOoo------------

Charlotte gasped and took her hand up to her mouth. "What" she whispered. Happy tears streaming down her face and down her hands. Gwen nodded and smiled bright. "You are pregnant" she said.
Charlotte sat down on the cold stone floor. She suddenly felt so light. Like she could fly. It was like a great burden was lifted from her shoulders. She could not believe that it was real. "I can not believe it" she whispered.
"Are you going tell Mr. Appleby"? Gwen asked.
Charlotte looked up with thoughtful eyes. "The test could be wrong, right"? She asked.
"Sometimes" Gwen answered. Charlotte looked down at her hands. "Then I'll wait until I am completely sure" she said.
She handed her hands up and Gwen took them to pull her mistress up from the floor. Gwen nodded. "That might be for the best" she agreed.
Charlotte looked at her maid. "Thank you so much" she said and hugged her. Gwen smiled and hugged her back. "I'm so happy for you" she said. Charlotte sighed and wiped away her tears. She put her hand on her stomach and smiled happily. 

Nathan sat at his desk. He didn't do anything. He just sat. Looking out of the window. There wasn't really anything to see out there. Just night. He couldn't let these versions spoil his life. But he could not understand why Charlotte wouldn't believe him. Why the priest had lied. He must have seen Arthur. Of course he had. Nathan wasn't mad. Arthur had been there. Perhaps Charlotte didn't love him. That thought hurt more than he could live with. But would she not believe him if she truly loved him. Nathan stood up angrily. Why had he never realised that she did not love him? How could he have been so stupid? Why should she love him? He was a broken man. Only a ghost of his former self. It was so obvious that Charlotte loved that stupid Mr. Payne. That was why she didn't wanted his help in the fields, so she could run away to the other man with out Nathan could know about it. He had been a fool. He kicked hard to his chair that felt and made a loud bang. It hurt, but he did not care. He had just realised another thing. He felt so stupid. Why hadn't he seen it before?  That was why Arthur was hunting him. It was a warning. Arthur was helping him to realise. Of course. It all made sense now. Nathan nodded to himself, but froze when he realised something else. That was also why Charlotte did not become pregnant. She did not want to, so she had done something to prevent it. Some sort of poison. She didn't want his child. But why was she with him then. Was it his money? Nathan nodded again. That must be it. When Queen Guinevere had died she had given him a lot of money. More than he could ever have needed. That was how he had could afford to buy the farm. He had also earned a lot himself with his doctor skills. He had learnt a lot over the five hundred years. It hurt so much to find out that his love was a traitor, but he just had to live with it. He had come over worse things. It was lucky that Arthur had warned him. Nathan sat the chair up and sat down on it. For now on he wouldn't feel. It could only mean pain. First Arthur and all the others from Camelot: The knights, Gaius, Freya, his mother, Morgana he could go on and on and know Charlotte. All the people there had betrayed him or had died in his arms. He could not take it anymore. It had to stop. He had to stop feeling. That was his new plan. He nodded for himself. That was an effective and good plan. Charlotte could continue her affair and her betrayal, but she would get no more love from him. He didn't feel anything for her anymore. She was nothing for him. She was his farm manager and that was that. That she also was his wife meant nothing. Nothing at all. She just lived in his house and slept in his bed, but truly she was nothing for him. That was what he told himself anyway. He stood up and locked the drawer up so he could get the old book. He sat himself down at his desk and started writing about his new discoveries.

Charlotte and Gwen jumped when there sounded a loud bang from the office. "What is he doing"? Gwen asked shocked.
Charlotte shook her head. "I don't know" she said.
She wiped away another tear and sighed. "I will go to bed" she said.
"Of course mam" Gwen said.
Charlotte walked slowly up the stairs. She was tired, but so happy. She could not help to hold a hand on her stomach. She could not believe that there was a little baby in there. She sang while she changed clothes and did all the things she did before bed time. All things would be good. Nathan, herself and there little baby would be so happy. Nathan should learn the child do the office work. Do the papers and money things. Charlotte would learn the kid other things. She didn't care about the sex of the baby. She just wanted to be a family.

Nathan heard Charlotte walk upstairs. He was also very tired. He blew out the candle on his desk. He stood up and carefully took the book back in its place. He locked the drawer, hid the key and walked to the door. He hadn't more light in the office so he could not really find the door first. When he found it he opened it and walked out. When he came out in the living room he blinked at the sharp light and then he froze. Arthur sat in the red armchair with his crown and kingly clothes on. "Arthur" Nathan mumbled happily and stumbled forward.
Arthur smiled. "I'm glad that you have figured her out" He said.
"Thanks to you" Nathan answered happy.
Arthur nodded. "But you can't tell her that you know about her affair. Just act like everything is normal, without the love" he said.
Nathan nodded. "I will never feel again" he said.
"No man or woman is worth your tears" Arthur said.
Nathan smiled and walked over to touch his friend, but suddenly he was gone. Nathan's fingers only touched the chair. He sighed, but smiled. Arthur was with him. He was not alone.

Charlotte lay in the bed. She could not sleep. She was so happy. Her thoughts kept wandering to what would happen when she told Nathan and how there life would turn out to be. She looked up when the bedroom door opened. Nathan came in. He did not look at her. "Hello dear" She said.
Nathan looked at her and nodded, but that was that. She looked at him while he changed. He moved slow and totally ignored her. When he was done he lay down beside of her. Charlotte moved over to him and kissed him. He kissed back, but there was no emotion. "Are you alright"? She asked.
"Just tired" He answered.
She kissed him again, but he turned his back at her. "I want to sleep" he said. Charlotte looked confused at him. What was wrong with him? She missed the old Nathan Appleby. The man there was so loving, caring, sweet, funny and so much more. He was the man that she loved with all her heart. This man was cold and she was a little scared of him. She did not know where she had him. But he would become himself again. He was just tired. Maybe he also missed London, but it would become better. It was only a phase.

When Nathan heard Charlotte's breath slowing down he smiled in the dark. "I hurt her" He whispered out in the empty room.
"She thinks I'm crazy Arthur. But she is the crazy one. How could she believe I would not find out what she was doing" he said.
No one answered him, but he did not care. He knew that Arthur was with him. He closed his eyes and felt soon after a sleep. The moon stood high on the heaven and the night was black when Nathan slowly turned in his sleep. His arms searched for something until they found Charlottes warm body. He wrapped his arms around her and smiled in his sleep.

A week later Charlotte's before so happy mood was destroyed. Nathan had acted more distant than ever before. She hated it, but did not know what to do about it. Nathan had not seen anything new, as far as she knew. But he didn't really speak to her anymore, so she could not be entirely sure. He still behaved cold against her. He never talked to her, kissed her, helped her or anything. Sometimes he did not even look at her, but when he did it was with eyes there scared Charlotte. They were filled with something there looked like hate, but she could not understand why he could be mad at her. Had she done something? He always answered when she talked to him, but with as few words as possible. They still slept in the same bed, but he would not even allow a good night kiss.
Out side the little family everything went fantastic. The harvest had been good and now all the axis stood dry and golden in the barn. The people and animals of the village would not starve. They had made a deal with the rail way people and next year they could drive there harvest to London far more easy than this year. Charlotte had also all the strawberry plans figured out. The workers had marked the piece of land that they would save to the berries and left the rest so they again could use it for cereal. So the farm had it perfect. It had come a long way since the previous owners. But inside the nobility house things looked quite different.

Nathan and Charlotte sat in the dinning room and ate dinner. It was a delicious porridge with berries, but none of the two really tasted it. Nathan looked down in his bowl without eating, while Charlotte just looked at him. She could not bear his silence any longer. "We need to talk" she said and put down her spoon.
First he did not respond. Then slowly he lifted his head and looked at her. No emotion in his face. She did not know what to say. His empty eyes frightened her. "About"? Nathan asked irritated when she did not say anything.
"About you and your behaviour" she said as calm as she could manage.
A little smile rose at his lips, but it was gone as fast as it had appeared. "What behaviour"? He asked.
"You behave like a doll. You don't do anything. Where is Nathan? Where is the man that I love"? Charlotte could no longer keep it inside of her.
The first tear ran down at her cheek. Nathan still looked emotion less and that hurt her that he did not care. "I am who I am. Perhaps it's you there have changed" he said.
Charlotte stood up so fast that her glass tilted, but she didn't care. Nathan looked up at her, sighed, and then looked back down in his bowl. He took his spoon and was on his way to eat a mouthful of his porridge when Charlotte opened her mouth: "I am pregnant" she said.
Nathan froze. The spoon still in the air. "I am pregnant with your child, Nathan Appleby" she said.
Another tear found is way down her cheek. Nathan looked up at her. Charlotte breathed fast. She did not like the look in his eyes. He stood up slowly. She wanted to run away, but didn't. He walked around the table, so he stood right in front of her. Suddenly his cold eyes melted. "You are pregnant" he said.
His eyes glassy from tears. Charlotte nodded. Nathan took his hands on her stomach and smiled down at her. "We will be parents" he said.
Charlotte nodded and smiled in relief. Nathan sobbed and then hugged her. She almost laughed. It felt so good to have him back. "Yes. Parents" she said into his dark curls.
He hugged her tight, but was careful around her stomach. They just stood there. Hugging. Both smiling and crying. Nathan sighed and pulled away. "We are going to be a family" he said. Charlotte smiled. "Yes we are" she said. Nathan took her by her hand and pulled her into the living room. He placed her in one of the comfortable chairs. He sat himself in another one in front of her. Charlotte looked at him in wonder. "What have been going on with you"? She asked.
She almost immediately regretted her question. Nathan's face felt back to the cold stone mask. "Please Nathan. Tell me" she pleaded.
He looked up at her face. At her eyes, her nose, her hair. All her. All that he had said to himself that he didn't loved anymore. There she was. Pregnant and very, very lovable. "Arthur" he mumbled fast.
Charlotte sighed and looked away for a moment, but then she looked him directly in the eyes. "Tell me the entire story" she said.
When Nathan looked away she continued: "Please Nathan. I love you. Nothing can change that".
He looked up at her. She stayed silence. "Fine" he said and nodded.
"Fine, but then you must promise me that you will be listening and not say anything until I'm done" he said. Charlotte nodded. Nathan looked out of the window for a moment before he sighed and then he started telling his story. He told about who he really was: Merlin the great sorcerer, also known as Emrys. He told about his time in Camelot. How hard it had been, but also how great. He told about all his friends there: the servants, the knights, his mother, Gwen, Gaius and of course his best friend, Arthur. The great king of Camelot. The man behind the round table. He told about all the adventures he had been on and of all his looses: Freya, Will, Lancelot, his father, Gwaine, his mother, Gaius, Arthur. All the ones he had loved were dead now. If not in battle then of age. He told about Morgana that he hadn't been able to save and the fact that he was a dragon lord. Threw the entire story Charlotte looked out of the window with out really seeing anything. When Nathan stopped talking she still looked out of the glass. Out to the darkness. Nathan looked at her. A tear ran down of her cheek. Then she finally looked up at him. "You are mad" she cried silently.
Nathan could feel his heart fall in his chest. She did not believe him. "You said.." he said confused.
Charlotte stood up still with the silent tears streaming down of her face. "I said that I always would love you and I will, but you are a mad man Nathan Appleby" she had to take a deep breath before she could continue:
"I have given you everything. Everything I have and you have abandoned me" she cried.
"No, I'm not mad. I am Merlin. Son of Ballinor. A sorcerer and the last dragon lord" Nathan rambled out.
"Please stop" Charlotte cried.
Nathan stood up and looked at her with big eyes. Why couldn't she just believe him? "Fine then. Prove it" She whispered.
"What"? Nathan asked confused. "Prove that you are a sorcerer" she said.
Nathan looked angrily down on his boots. "I can't" he mumbled.
Charlotte sighed and turned to the door. Nathan went forward and grabbed her arm. "Ever since Arthur died I have not could use my powers" he cried.
Charlotte did not look at him. "Unhand me" she whispered.
"Charlotte" Nathan cried.
"Unhand me" she shouted.
Nathan moved his hand. "I'm going to go" she said.
"Go where"? He asked.
"Away from your cold eyes and your lies" she answered with out looking at him.
"After everything I have done for you and you look at me as if I'm the mad one. But it's you. You're afraid, of giving birth, of motherhood, so you project this infancy alert onto me, making me the thing that you fear, which is not only unfair, but stupid" Nathan said angrily.
"And you're so clever, cause you found a profession where you could feel less damaged because everyone else is damaged more" Charlotte said cold. Nathan nodded in agreement. "But now down here you have to face it. There is something wrong with your mind" she said.
"Oh, doctor Charlotte" Nathan said ironic.
"And your heart" she said.
She could no longer hold back the tears. "So young and yet so wise" he said also with glassy eyes.
"And your soul" Charlotte continued with tears on her cheeks.
Nathan looked at the window. None of them said anything for a moment. "I can't" Nathan mumbled still looking out of the window.
"Can't what"? Charlotte asked confused.
Nathan turned his head and looked at her. "Recall what I liked about you" he said cold.
Charlotte sobbed and lifted her head high before turning and leaving with out saying anything. Nathan closed his eyes when he heard the door slamming. He could see Charlotte out of the window. She was heading for the horses. Nathan knew where she would go: to her lover. Mr. Payne. He couldn't really understand what happened or why it happened. It was like his mind was crashing down around him. He smiled sad and turned away from the window. Well it was only a question of time you could say. He went out to the kitchen. If his mind was crashing down anyway it would do no harm to make the process go a little faster. He slowly opened the door to the kitchen and looked in. Gwen stood and prepared dough. Nathan looked at her for a while. Thinking. She turned and jumped of shock when she saw him. She took her hand up to her heart. "Mr. Appleby"? She said.
Nathan smiled, but it seemed to frighten her more than calm her. "You look alarmed" he said and walked down the small steps to the kitchen.
"You took me for a ghost of my former self" he continued and looked with crazy eyes at his maid.
Gwen stood a little nervously and looked at him, but when he didn't say anything, she did: "Is the mistress here"? Nathan looked around in the kitchen.
"No" he said looking for something. After a little while he turned to her. "Take a few days of" he said.
"Sir"? Gwen asked confused.
"Now" Nathan sighed.
Gwen looked confused around before looking suspicious at him. "Where is she"? She asked.
"She is gone and the sooner you follow the better" Nathan said.
Gwen nodded confused. She took of her apron and then went out. Nathan waited until he heard the door slam for the second time in few minutes, then her walked over to the shelves. "Where was it"? He mumbled.
He looked under all the bowls until he found the little key. He took down the chest and locked it up. "Let's see" he said.
He looked at the different bottles. He took a little one up with some liquid in. There were a white piece of paper stuck on the side. With beautiful handwriting there stood 'Opium' on it. Nathan shook the bottle and nodded. Then he quickly took out the prop and drank it. He stood a little while and stared out into the empty air. A crazy smile formed at his lips. He stumbled into his office. His version blurred. He felt down on the ground. Colors and forms changed and he didn't know where he was. "Merlin"! A voice called.
Nathan tried to stand up. He knew that voice. He stumbled and crawled into the living room. He smiled when he saw his best friend stand by the window. His hair was golden in the afternoon sun and his face lightened up in a smile. "Merlin" Arthur said and stretched out his hand.
"It's just you and me now" Arthur said. Nathan sighed and smiled. "Yes. Just you and me" he said.

---------------ooOoWoOoo----------------

Thank you for fighting through these long chapters;)
Feeling generous? Go follow me on Instagram: colinmorgan_fan