Is a Dream Just a Dream?

Love and Happiness

"Can we go to the mall Dad?" Bryce looks over at his twin huffing and rolling his eyes at his youthful exuberance "Why do you want to go to the mall dork?" Derrick looks up from his Nintendo, scrunching his eyebrows at his brother "I want to see if there's any new manga out". Manga, it's some kind of Japanese comic thing...Derrick loves them. Bryce thinks he's a nerd for reading them and Will doesn't understand how to read them from right to left instead of left to right. Kristen thinks they're pictographically pornography. Therefore, it's up to me as his father to impress upon him how unsatisfactory it is for him to be in possession of such materials. I grew up in California in the sixties I don't believe in censorship. If he likes to read Japanese comic porn...well I don't want to know about it, but as long as it's not hurting anyone else I don't see the problem.

"You wonder why you can't pick up girls. You're such a geek, I can't believe we're twins" like a flash Will lands a punch on Bryce's arm and he doubles up in pain "Asshole! What was that for?". Will goes back to his sketch book "For calling Derrick a geek. Nice nail polish by the way" hmmm. I'm not sure what to do here, Will's always been good at refereeing the two of them and Kristen always jumped my ass for scolding them. But he shouldn't hit his brother...Stevie must think I'm a shit father. I should say something "Boys will you knock it off? We can go to the mall if you want Derrick but we have to go to the market too".

Derrick looks up at his twin brother triumphantly Will scrutinizes his latest sketch. Bryce sighs flipping his bangs "Whatever". I sometimes wonder if that's his answer for everything. Bad grades? Whatever. Dope in your school bag? Whatever. Get caught peeping at the girls volleyball team undressing? Whatever. Take a swing at a cop? Your get the point. The scent of perfume wafts down the stairs and Stevie appears in her casual clothes. Dark leggings and a flowing dress that lays off one shoulder. Simple jewelry, but I know for a fact it costs an arm and a leg. I bought it for her for her birthday last year, and she kicked me out on my ass after we finished screwing. That hurt. But I understand why she did it.

"Look at all the handsome men waiting on me. I feel like a princess." Grinning I wheel toward her taking her hand "More like a goddess. You look great" she bends down pecking my lips my hand lingers on her hip a bit longer than necessary and she gently swats it away mouthing "later" at me. "You hear that Derrick at least one woman finds you handsome". Derrick's face turns red "Fuck you Bryce!". For crying out loud "I told you two to cut it out!" I snap at them angrily. All three of them look up, and I realize I haven't lost my temper with them in months. That's a sign of recovery right?

Stevie looks at me but says nothing gathering her bag "Shall we?" Another big difference between Kristen and Stevie. Kristen would have picked a fight with me for yelling at "Her" children. Then she would have catered to whichever one of them I got angry with, and they'd both ignore me for the rest of the day. Stevie, though I can tell she's not happy with me yelling like that, won't say anything until later if she says anything at all.

The car waits for us outside and the driver helps me in first, Stevie and the boys following after me. It's a limo so we're on two bench seats facing each other. Kids on one side adults on the other. Stevie lays her hand in mine and I hold it in my lap smiling at her as she kisses me. Bryce and Derrick zone out in front of their electronics Will keeps sketching. Is it wrong for me to be just a touch upset about my boys lack of interest in music? I always figured at least one of them would want to follow in my footsteps or even just play for leisure. Nope, not a single sign of musical ability.

How much of that has to do with Kristen's outright disdain for what I do, I'll probably never know.

"Don't forget hon, Mike is coming over later for your workout" another day another grueling session with Mike. He says my legs are being stubborn, the rest of my body seems to have repaired itself nicely. I have no clue as to whether its neurological, physiological, or psychological. I imagine it's a mixture of all three.