i looked into the mirror.
like time and time before to see the face i knew too
well
looking back at me.
giving me a sorrowful look,
i read her big blue eyes like a fairytale.
her story only revealing one word, lost.
the girl in the mirror looked like me, but was surely not.
i frowned, as i watched her light pink lips stretch from
ear to ear revealing
her white pearls, ones i know of too
well.
i can't remember the last time i looked as happy as her.
my teeth never to be shown, god forbid my lips stretched from ear to ear.
her confidence made my self esteem drop.
i began to yell at her, questions i knew she didn't know the answer to.
'why can't i be as happy as you?'
'why are you so proud of your body?'
'why can't i feel confident in my own?'
'why
can't i
feel confident in my own?'
she looked up at me, her face stained with tears.
and i looked down, my chest wasn't risen like hers.
i looked back into the mirror, her flowy skirts looked like black sweatpants on me.
my baggy tee couldn't compare to her white lace blouse.
why couldn't i look so elegant?
why couldn't i look so beautiful and cheerful as she?
her long brown locks looked so much better than my shaggy hair.
my masculine build overpowered her small frame,
one i wish i could obtain.
-
the clock struck midnight, not only was i missing one glass slipper i was missing two.
if only i could have been her.
the one whose eyes were all on her immaculate facade.
elegant dresses, beautiful shoes, and long strawberry blonde hair
pearl earrings and diamond rings, why couldn't that be me?
i wanna look like the princesses in fairytales,
thats an understatement you see,
i want to be the princesses in the fairytale.
i want to look in the mirror and finally be happy with what i see,
my mom shouts to up to me through the creaky wooden floors
"mason, come down for dinner"
i spoke under my breath..
"don't call me mason."
i stumbled out of my room, and made my way down to our victorian dining room.
i greeted my mother at the table,
thoughts were flooding my mind.
i held my head in my sweaty palms.
my mother asked "mason.. what's wrong"
repeating her statement once more.
i couldn't take it
i snapped
"stop calling me that! thats not my name."
staring at me blankly, her eyes started to fill with tears.
she proceeded to send me to my room when i beat her to it.
rushing up the stairs, i made my way to my blue bedroom.
rage filling me,
i threw the mirror that makes a mockery out of me each and every day,
the shards spreading along my floor.
my fingers started to bleed,
but that didn't matter to me.
i shouted out in pure anger
"why couldn't you have just kept to yourself?!"
-
my mother barged into my room,
she didn't ask if i was okay.
she simply and cold heartedly told me to pack my things and leave.
so i did.
-
i took my school bag and filled it with several things,
i proceeded to turn and walk out of my room.
i stumbled down the stairs with tears in my eyes,
and walked out the door.
i guess i was wrong,
life doesn't always end in happy endings.
