Just Like Maddie

{4} It will never be normal again

Chapter 4-

It will never be normal again

The rest of Mackenzies day went by in a blur. She learned in the maths lesson that Carter was not only gorgeous looking but he had an amazing personality too. Maybe not exactly what she was supposed to be learning in maths but she didn't care, he was perfect. Much to her disappointment she was in no other classes with him and didn't see him in break or lunch due to his football practice. She couldn't even find the courage to ask Casey about him, were they an item? Was it her brother? Why did she have to leave him alone? No. She didn't ask a single one, instead she smiled and laughed politely and her insulting jokes to passerby's and agreed with everything she said. Casey had a knack of making people feel small and that is exactly how Mackenzie felt in that group. She hadn't given much thought to how she could resolve this, she only hoped it could get better.

"Mum? That's me in from school I'm going up to do homework," Mackenzie yelled making her way up stairs to her room. She wasn't really going to do homework, she just didn't want to talk to her mom. Melissa hadn't been the same since that day, she seemed distant, like she was just going through the motions. Mackenzie sighed no one was the same after what happened. Her ipad lit up and the face time ring tone began to play. Mackenzie chucked her bag on the floor and rolled on to her bed sliding her finger across the screen to answer, not bothering to check who it was. Instantly an old yet familiar smiling face popped up on the screen, Nia. "Hey Mack, long time no speak! I got your text this morning btw. I have missed your little face," her voice blasted through the speakers. Mackenzie felt a smile creep on her face, as hard as the circumstances might be it was nice to be missed. "I miss you too Niabear, I miss everyone else too," Mackenzie said truthfully. No matter what happened she still loved them all. "How are they?" Mackenzie asked hesitantly. Nia was in the middle of pulling her hair into a bun, she must have dance later on. "Umm, they are good I suppose. It's just, just different," Nia pulled a face, "the whole environment is different, a lot calmer but also a lot duller. I don't like it much to be honest." Mackenzie nodded, she knew that things wouldn't be normal. Nothing was normal after that day. "I take it you have dance today? I have dance too," Mackenzie stated changing the subject. She balanced her ipad on her dresser and rummaged through her drawers for some dance wear. "Yup. It would have been pyramid day but we don't do that now. How are you liking the new studio?" Nia asked now finished her perfect bun and even added a small red bow at the front. Mackenzie decided on a plain red leotard, her new studio wasn't big on fancy dance wear. "Again its different, but a good different I guess. The teachers are a lot nicer but also a lot bigger on technique, I take triple the amount of ballet I did at Abbys. Maddie would have loved it," Mackenzie babbled on. Somehow whenever Mackenzie talked she always wandered back to Maddie. "Mackenzie? We are leaving in 10 minutes hurry up!" Melissa yelled from downstairs. Nia laughed. "I guess I better let you go. If you ever need to talk about it Kenz, you know where I am. I miss her too you know we all do, more than you think," Nia said a lot more seriously and sensitively, "love ya Mackenzie." Mackenzie pressed the end call button as fast as she could. She didn't want to talk about it, she didn't even want to talk about talking about it. She wanted to go to dance and forget that part of the conversation even happened, so she did.

"So mackenzie, I started seeing a doctor again today," Melissa stated emotion absent from her tone. After what happened Melissa found for help but visiting multiple doctors and therapists in Pittsburgh but none of them helped. Melissa simply didn't want to hear a word they had to say. Mackenzie was shocked that she was seeing one again. "Really?" she asked tentatively, "how was it?" Melissa gulped not removing her eyes from the road. "Better now, I like the doctor better now but we will have to see. I just wanted you to know because he says he would like to possibly speak to you too," Melissa sighed, "I know its been hard on all of us. It could maybe help ease the pain a little." Mackenzie tensed up. She didn't want to talk about Maddie to anyone never mind a stranger. She couldn't believe how ridiculous her mom was being. She wanted to scream. But she didn't. Instead she simply replied as calmly as she could, "no thanks mom. I really don't want to do that." Blinking rapidly trying to suppress the tears. Melissa nodded meekly as a silence filled the car. Mackenzie used to love those rare moments of silence during her crazy fame filled childhood but now, she hated it. Silence meant being alone with your thoughts and memories. And there was always one memory that played out over and over in poor little Mackenzies head.

A/N- There is a big event happening in one of the chapters soon I have it all planned out and it's sure to change things up a bit in the story! Again keep voting and commenting I love getting feedback(: