What If I Say No?

Being Fed Up With You

After what just happened about me and her, my energy to bond, to talk or to see her becomes exactly 0%. I am now totally fed up. Perhaps, it becomes worst even more. I don't wanna go to her house anymore but then, I still came. I don't have any honest excuse so, Ok. First of all, I didn't want it, but then, it's now "I severely don't want to go to your house anymore! Please. I think you just want me to be with you at your home, so you can make out with your boyfriend. So your mom won't think anything bad if I'm at your room with you guys. It's kinda awkward dude. It irritates me so much. I'm hearing the way you two make out and I'm seeing the way you two flirt with each other. And more than just that. It's hardcore!! Then you force me to sleep over? Really? You two are noisy, and dude. Eiw, yuck. I would rather study my lessons at home than to stay with you. You can flirt whenever you want but why can't you see that this is not ok for me? I don't wanna bond with you anymore. You can make out but please don't leave me out of it. I'm just wasting my time. Why am I here? To bond or to be your effing audience? Maybe I'm here because you don't want your mom to be informed on what you two are doing that's why you are also using me. How I wish I'm not your friend anymore.

After a week, she blocked me. I know why. Because I'm not going at her house anymore, but I always have legit excuses. Whenever she invites me, I do my thesis, there's long quizzes, of course I'm busy. I feel so relieved my excuses are understandable. I can't lie. I still pmed her in instagram and, asked her why (Pm means private message). So I believe that she'll be ok. It's ok if she didn't reply. A week ago, I was with Danielle (my bestfriend in psych department) at school. Then I saw her with his boyfriend. I didn't say 'Hi' because it's awkward. I know she's upset with me especially she blocked me and she didn't reply on my pm. Days ago, she pmed me (using her boyfriend's account). She confronted me and she's really angry.

"You're ignoring me now!!? Because you found a better BESTFRIEND than me? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Do u even know what I've been through? No, because you don't even care. To think I trusted you. Well, thanks proving me wrong. I guess you won't take this message seriously at all, because you're not very sensitive. But anyhow, thanks for making me feel like a full utter shit, Jen. What goes around, comes back around."

As I expected. If I will say no, she'll get angry and thinks that I'm a bad person and insensitive. Stupid. What the hell. Just please leave me alone. Even I don't have a new bestfriend, I really don't want to be your friend anymore, bitch.

Me: "I'm ignoring you because you blocked me. What do you expect? You also didn't reply in my message in Instagram. I don't know what you're thinking. It's obvious that you're mad at me so I wouldn't say hi if we see each other in school." *Acting like an innocent

Her: "You're being insensitive. Why? How many times do I have to reach you out? I went at your house but you're not around. I always invite you to bond, to eat dinner here, to have a celebration after exams, but guess what? You all ignored it. But if Danielle will invite you, you will go. Awesome. Another thing, why do you keep reaching out a friend only in facebook/instagram? Dude, I ate my pride for you! I invited you for several times. I went to your house. I gave you the benefit of the doubt. But it's clear that you don't want the friendship. Worst, you are ignoring it. I will destroy anyone who gets in my way. I don't hate you. I'm angry because you're doing nothing."

Danielle and I are blockmates. Obviously, we will get together because we always have the same tasks and same schedule, and at least she's not manipulating and draining me like you do. She respects if I'm not free to go with her. Why so jealous? You don't own me. We're already not classmates so it's normal that I'll have new friends, and you'll have new friends too from other department. You also have a new bestfriend now in Business Ad department, haven't you? You twice told me. And the times when you're inviting me, I will repeat it again, I will always have an honest and reasonable excuses.