War Bird

28. Outlook Blue.

I have spent two whole days with Grace in the Medical Bay and it's obvious that I not a Nightingale by anyone's standards. Although I can now make several poultices and stop bleeding, open wounds and broken bones are totally beyond me. I sedated and restrained a hysterical Private and I was able to freeze a Ratim Fistuca, but only for ten minutes before it defeated me. Grace has been all gracious and that, but she's obviously disappointed.

"It's not you, you know," I tell her at breakfast on the third day. "You're a great teacher."

"I can't be that good," she says miserably, taking a sip of tea. "I should have been able to get you to close that leg wound yesterday."

"It's me!" I insist. "I'm rubbish! I don't have any power."

"Don’t say that!" Grace shakes her head. "You just aren’t able to cast properly yet. If only I were able to help you tap into it." She clatters her teacup back into its saucer. "I'm a failure!"

"Hey, it's alright." I nudge her. "You've worked really hard."

"No, it's just Ed, he's been so worried about you."

"When did you see him? He’s always so busy, I never get to see him!" I watch her as she fusses over a drop of spilt tea. 

"He's fine," she says. "I just happened to bump into him after dinner last night." Then her cheeks turn pink and she picks up her spoon, jamming it into her porridge.

"Oh really?" I say. She can't look me in the eye. "Just bumped into him?"

"Yes!" She’s going even redder. "He was helping to bring in some spare fuel and I was cleaning-"

"Whatever," I say, poking her. "You fancy him don't you?"

"Excuse me?"

"You totally have a thing for Ed!" I laugh. "Admit it."

"I don't believe it's any of your bus-"

"Oh it is," I interrupt, loving how flustered she looks. "It's all my business."

"You're talking nonsense.” She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. "I mean, even if I were to, you know, admit to having any feelings... well, there’s no chance that he feels the- that he would want to-"

"Oh, he would. He’d want to.”

“He isn’t even a Sorcerer!” She says. “So even if I did - and I’m not saying that I do - a relationship would be impossible.”

“You’re right.” I hide my satisfied grin behind my teacup. “You’re so right. You guys are so incompatible. It’d never work.”

"Although!” She blurts. “It's true that he seems to be making quite the impression on General Arkwright," Grace says. "Apparently he's never seen a non-sorcerer display such espionage skills. And it's impressive, I have to say. I mean, how is he such a natural?"

I don't say anything for a sec. I'm remembering the stealth with which Ed broke into Mr. Pelham's flat, the way he was so comfortable popping the window out. And now I’m wondering about the odd-jobs he did for his Uncle. The jobs that paid out a lot of instant cash. I look at Grace’s lovely, open face and force a smile. "All you need to know is, at heart, Ed ‘s a decent guy. I've seen the way he makes you smile. That’s real."

"I'm not denying he has a good sense of humour." Grace cradles her cup with elegant fingers. "But anyway. This is silliness. Once you break the Lectiones Anima you will all be out of here and I'll be long forgotten." Her voice is its normal calm way but her face is drawn and sad.

"I can't speak for Ed," I say, nudging her with my shoulder and she looks at me from under lowered lashes. "But I will never forget how kind you've been."