Ive got a golden ticket, i really have.

News paper of my dreams lives in my bra.

Finally it was Saturday, and I jumped out of bed, I knew there was nothing for me to open, but that didn't matter, I knew there would be no one up either, but that didn't matter none. I just wanted to be the first one to say happy birthday to me.

''Happy birthday you old slubber-dub.''

I claimed rubbing my eyes, and scratching my belly in the mirror. My god, I felt like a bear, then again, with that hair, I kinda looked like one too, ha. I viewed my stretch marks, didn't really bother me, I found them kinda cute, they were like golden worms.

I sat on the toilet for my birthday wee, the first wee that I had ever had since I was sixteen, its funny really, I could say that I was a year younger the last time I went to the toilet ha.

Sat there on the toilet, laughing to my self, about that scene in, guess what film, of course last action hero. The one where Benedict kills that old guy in the pool, I know it aint funny to kill any one, especially old people, but, I don't know, the old bad guy looks so bloody confused.

Ah, I loved that scene, where that Benedict guy says '180 you spaghetti slurping twerp, 180 – trust me' and then, boom. Funny as hell.

Flushed the toilet, and headed for the stairs, nearly braking my bloody neck by the way, can no one pick up after there bloody self's.

Stupid, stupid shoe. I thought to my self kicking Daisy's favourite shoe down the stairs, she couldn't hit me, not today, as for I was the birthday girl. Then again, never mind Daisy, the shoe would get its own back, would probably trip me at the bottom of the stairs.

Sat down and plonked my self in front of a magazine, hmm, posh it worth more then she was worth last year, ha, maybe she had lost another stone or 5, I hated that you know, when skinny people pretend to eat, what a joke.

Oh no, Elton John's dead, he died after his very first time as a judge on the Xfactor, well, no, he didn't die, but his career did, then again really, all his career ever was, was been a homo, he seemed nice thought.

It was 12 now, hmm, I guessed I must have nodded back off, then again how the bloody hell were you meant to sleep with some one's feet in your face, not very comfortably that's how.

Mam woke me up, god I hate that you know, I hate when mam gets woken up, she woke up because Ash was knocking on the door, I mean, I already cut him a key, but always bloody forgot it didn't he.

I don't mind getting woken up, but mam, I mean, how bloody annoying, I'm not saying she's lazy or she'd be snappy if awoken or ought, but I mean, with me finishing school a month ago, that was the end of warily mornings, and rushed days for mam, she could relax now, relax as much as she bloody well wanted.

''Ash is here baby.''

Her words were gentle to my ears, like they always were, she was so good to us, and we couldn't even afford to give her money to put in the meter. Loved my mam I did.

I stretched, and jumped off the chair. Ash was there, standing at the living room door, looking ever so out of place.

''Sit down lad, your making the room look untidy.''

Mam joked, but Ash, my god, known him for years, and he still calls mam Mrs. Alf. He wont even sit down, unless he's invited to, he's like a vampire, but instead of doors, it was chairs. Odd ball.

''I will Mrs. Alf, thank you Mrs. Alf.''

Where the hell did he think he was, some where posh or some thing.

Mam just smiled, and rolled her eyes at him.

''Happy birthday doodle bug.''

That was mam's pet name for me, for some reason, I mean, aint a doodle bug some thing to do with war, aint it a bad killing machine, or a gun or some thing. didn't matter what the hell it was, because to me, it was a curly little bug that you'd find drawn in a child's doodle pad, or on a child's bed room wall, ye, probably my bedroom wall, ha, ye, I was pretty childish, and that's the way I liked it.

''Thanks mam.''

I said kissing her on the cheek.

''Cup of tee mam.''

''don't you dare move, its your birthday.''

And I inched towards the kitchen door, joking.

''You move, and I swear, ill glue you on that chair, any way, what do you wanna watch birthday girl.''

The only thing that id ever want to watch, but the video player was up stairs, but I guess 'Jeremy U.S.A' will be all good for now.

''J.K.''

Mam asked guessing correctly, clicking the remote. Good one.

''You know it baby girl.''

I smiled, sitting straight back down on the chair I got up from, it was still warm, good for me, right.

Mam went straight in to the kitchen, and Ash came and jumped on my knee.

''Hey there birthday girl, what you wanna do today.''

And that was it, I couldn't hold it in any more, not for any longer, I swear I would surly burst if I had to, I couldn't say nothing in front of mam, she knew me too well, she so knew me.

''Shush.''

I whispered putting my finger on my lips.

''Read this.''

I whispered, pulling an article from a newspaper from my bra, and handing it straight to Ash.

''What are you two whispering about.''

Yep, I'm a loud mouth, but believe me, I knew how to be quite, then again, mam, she had better hearing then bats.

''Nothing dear.''

I claimed grabbing the piece of news paper from Ash's grasp, and straight back in my bra it went, and that's exactly where it would stay until 12 o'clock midnight.